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Your Biggest Blind Spot

Blog, Career, Media

Do you remember the first time you heard a recording of your own voice? Going back to that moment now, what went through your mind?

Were you shocked or pleasantly surprised? Did you expect you’d sound like that?

Most people respond the same way. When they hear themselves on tape, they get a bit uncomfortable and will tell you:

“That doesn’t sound like me at all. Who is that person? Did I just say that?”

People tend to become very self-conscious and self-critical. Why? Because most of us don’t have a clue how other people perceive the sound of our voice. How could we?

We hear ourselves from the inside 24/7. We’re locked into our own little world thinking that -because we perceive ourselves a certain way- others hear what we hear and will respond accordingly.

Let me break the news to you: they do not.

CONFRONTATIONAL CAMERAS

As a media trainer, I spent many years coaching influential people on how to prepare for interviews on radio and TV. My favorite part was taking a CEO to a studio and putting him or her in front of a few cameras and blinding lights, while I would ask innocent questions.

Read the rest of this story in my new book. Click on the cover to access the website and get a sneak peek. Use the buttons to buy the book.

Making Money In Your PJs cover

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Filed Under: Blog, Career, Media Tagged With: best vocal coach, finding a coach, finding a voice-over coach, finding your purpose, focus groups, know thyself, learning from feedback, learning from mistakes, media coaching, media training, narcissism, Nethervoice, overcoming perfectionism, Paul Strikwerda, perfectionism, voice-over, voiceovers, what makes a great coach

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Rich Owen says

    May 25, 2011 at 3:38 pm

    Great article, Paul.

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    • Paul Strikwerda says

      May 25, 2011 at 4:04 pm

      Thank you Rich!

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  2. Paul Hernandez says

    May 25, 2011 at 4:05 pm

    Excellent article Paul. I’ve had several coaches and if you are serious about this business I think it’s a must. It was my coaches who helped me to discover my “Guy Next Door” niche that never once occurred to me on my own.

    Thanks for sharing your wisdom and insight.

    Paul

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  3. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 25, 2011 at 4:37 pm

    You’re very welcome, Paul. Our professional blindness may keep us from seeing and hearing things that might be obvious to others. My own coaches still inspire me each and every day.

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  4. George I. Tsiros says

    May 25, 2011 at 6:17 pm

    Paul,

    Thanks for all the great words of wisdom! You are a wonderful teacher!

    George

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  5. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 25, 2011 at 6:23 pm

    Hi George, it’s great to hear from you. Thank you for your kind words.

    Great coaches learn just as much from their students, as their students learn from them. I have had the privilege of studying with many remarkable teachers. I’m so glad that I can pass on what they have given me.

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  6. Tony Tee Neto says

    May 26, 2011 at 6:45 am

    Excellent – Excellent – Excellent … as always!

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  7. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 26, 2011 at 7:42 am

    Thank you, thank you, thank you, Tony!

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  8. Jack Bair says

    May 26, 2011 at 11:45 pm

    Paul, Thank you for your help in this insightful writing. Lot of great stuff in there.

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  9. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 27, 2011 at 7:23 am

    Hello Jack, I’m glad some of what I wrote seemed to resonate with you. Thank you for taking the time to read my article. Most of my readers are busy people and there’s so much information coming at them. That’s why I am so happy to see that so many choose to spend a few minutes on these pages. I’m honored that you’re one of them!

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  10. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 27, 2011 at 7:32 am

    One of my readers agreed with the notion that we often our our own biggest blind spot, and observed:

    “On many occasions I just feel I am the reason for not attaining certain goals…”

    Here’s my response:

    We might not achieve our goals, but we always get results. Sometimes our goals are just not realistic. Sometimes we want too many things too fast. Sometimes we don’t have all the resources to get from A to B. Often, we need to understand what it is we’re doing that leads to an undesired result.

    Here’s the good news. If we happen to be the reason, it means that we have the potential and the power to change it. Changing other people or certain circumstances is much harder (or nearly impossible).

    In this golden age of self-help, I see so many colleagues trying to figure it all out by themselves. Solopreneurs are by definition on an island in the middle of what feels like a lonely planet. They lack quality feedback and that’s why they end up running around in circles, doing the same things, expecting different results.

    A coach can give you honest, quality feedback and help you break certain patterns that are still holding you back. A coach can teach you new tools and strategies to get you ready for the big game.

    But as I said in my article: You have to run the race! That way, you also get to take the credit for your wins!

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  11. James Phillips says

    May 27, 2011 at 7:05 pm

    Thank you for your gift, Paul! A double gift, actually: to write and then to share with us what you’ve written.

    A couple of the thoughts that crossed my mind as I read…

    ”As masters and commanders of the home studio, we’ve become a one-person multi-tasking band.”
    I wonder if this sometimes isn’t part of the problem. We think that we can (or that we should) do everything. However, the craft of a voice talent is one thing, a sound engineer is another, a script writer/adjuster is another, and a producer or director is yet another. Why are there clients not willing or incapable of assigning all the different jobs to the most capable people? Do we contribute to mediocrity by accepting to “do it all”? Why is the role of the home-studio-do-it-all-voice-artist given such promotion and the pro-studios in town are so often unknown territory to those very same VO talent, as are the advertising creatives, producers-directors…?

    “Talk is cheap.” Is this the reason I increasingly see spiraling downward rates being discussed on VO forums? I wonder, what would the result be if more dedication were given to developing relationships with pro studios, creatives, directors, producers… and dovetailing our respective crafts, that which we each do best?

    Just some midnight thoughts.

    Thanks again for your excellent and thought-provoking article!

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  12. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 27, 2011 at 7:31 pm

    The painful truth is that a great deal of clients as well as talent, doesn’t seem to be interested in top quality, but only in what’s “good enough”. That could easily be the topic of my next post.

    In a way, we are the conductor of our orchestra, but we also play the music, we record the CD, we manage and promote the band and we take care of pay roll. One way or the other, something’s got to give.

    I’m not the only one receiving requests to re-record a script that was delivered by a talent and didn’t meet minimum standards. Some clients have finally figured out that they get what they pay for.

    Our rate is in part an expression of how much we value what we have to offer. What clients are willing to pay is also an expression of how much they value what we have to offer. I too see a disconnect between how much we need to make in order to break even (to say the least), and how much “the market” is offering these days.

    That leaves us with three options:

    – giving up
    – giving in
    – sticking to our guns

    The first two options show lack of self-respect and a lack of character. They are the easy way out that will only lead to even lower rates. I don’t want to be part of that.

    The other day I got a request to do a 3-minute medical narration for $150. I gracefully declined and I gave the voice-seeker my minimum rate. One day later it was accepted without any hesitation or negotiation.

    You see, any salesperson knows that the first bid is hardly ever the real bid. It’s just a way to see how seriously you take yourself and your craft. If you’re falling for it and accept, we should talk because I’d like to sell you a car at sticker price!

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  13. Andy Boyns says

    May 28, 2011 at 4:18 am

    Listening back to some work I did introducing a TV magazine programme last week, I tried to apply some of my self critique to the similar spot I’ve just done for tomorrow’s programme. Realising that this required a slightly different read from what is usually required the reflection paid off… and it’s an ongoing process.

    Thanks for your succinct and though provoking article, as always.

    andy

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  14. Paul Strikwerda says

    May 28, 2011 at 6:48 am

    You’re very welcome, Andy! I’m glad you could apply the feedback strategy. In many cases, it is quite possible to be our own coach and cheerleader. Other times, we just need more tools in our toolbox, to get the desired result. In that case we’d need additional training.

    Most of us -myself included- suffer from partial professional blindness. Unknowingly, we have developed mannerisms we’re so accustomed to, we don’t even notice them anymore. That’s where unbiased outside ears come in.

    As they say in sports: even the best teams have coaches!

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  15. Rich McVicar says

    May 29, 2011 at 8:54 am

    Very helpful, Paul. Thank you! I’ve been broadcasting for 26 years and am finding it soooo difficult to get out of some of these announcery patterns. Advice from coaches is helping quite a bit. I especially like what you say about returning to past auditions with intention–writing down what’s good and bad and–so crucial–looking for patterns. Just listening and commenting in one’s own head, “Bleah!” or “Not bad!” isn’t going to get one very far. Coaches know how to be very encouraging, too!

    Rich

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  16. Dave Menashe says

    May 31, 2011 at 12:59 pm

    Wonderful advice. Thank-you, Paul

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  17. jennifer Hunter says

    April 23, 2013 at 1:54 pm

    Hello,
    Having bookmarked your Nethervoice site quite some time ago – Today I visited and read a bit of your wisdom again.
    thanks for putting the piece about take a clue from nature – how the “tree does not bare fruit until after it has put down deep roots” which takes time. This patience reminder is what I needed today.
    Now back to work for me.
    Warm wishes,
    Jen

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    • Paul Strikwerda says

      April 23, 2013 at 4:46 pm

      Hi Jen, thanks for spending some time on my blog! In this day and age of instant gratification, asking people to be patient is not a popular message. But that’s how the best wines are made!

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