“Want to work from home during COVID-19?”
“Millions of dollars paid out to voice actors globally.”
“Audition for your dream job now.”
“Instant access to amazing opportunities.”
“One million registered users can’t be wrong.”
“New job postings every day.”
It sure sounds tempting, doesn’t it? Especially when you’re young, idealistic, and impressionable. It’s the way online voice casting sites throw out their net. Especially now that many of us are jobless and stuck inside thanks to a killer virus.
Day after day an ever-growing army of hopefuls is eagerly looking at their inbox, waiting for the next “amazing opportunity” to become a voice over star. It comes at a price, though.
If you’re taking part in these online cattle calls, be ready to be milked!
Of course these casting sites won’t tell you that you have to spend between $349 and $399 per year to take part in a crapshoot. They’ll feed you success stories about people who claim to make a six-figure income by winning audition after audition. Anecdotal evidence always trumps independently verified numbers, right?
People believe what they want to believe when they’re desperate and uninformed.
So, today I’m not going to give you the golden formula to online voice over success. Sorry to break the news, but it does not exist. Instead, I will give you a few reasons why you probably should stay clear of this business. I’ll start with the most important one.
1. The world doesn’t need you.
Yes, you’ve heard me.
We have enough people talking into microphones, thank you very much. What this world needs is less talk and more action.
We need teachers, doctors, nurses, and scientists. We need experts in conflict resolution; people who know how to fight global warming and racism. We need first responders to pandemics, contact tracers and census takers.
If you really want to make a difference on this planet, don’t hide behind soundproof walls selling stuff no one needs. Get out there and start helping the poor, the sick, the homeless, the marginalized, and the ones without a voice. They need you more than Disney does.
2. There’s no money in voice overs.
The cost of living goes up every year while voice over rates are in steady decline. That makes sense, doesn’t it? Even the union can’t stop it. Thanks to online casting services and ignorant amateurs, your voice has become a commodity, sold by the lowest bidder to the cheapest client.
VO has become a game of averages, and here’s how it works.
The bottom feeders choose lowball sites like Upwork, Fiverr, and freelancer.com to sell their services for beer money. The top end of the market consists of A-list actors making millions voicing cartoons and commercials. If you’re average, you’re forever stuck in the middle. You have enough integrity to leave the crumbs to the idiots, but you won’t get the big gigs for the big money.
Don’t be fooled by voice-over veterans posting on Facebook how well they are doing. Some of them confided in me that they’re just keeping up appearances. No one wants to hire a loser, so they’ve got to tell the world they’re still an important player. Yay for social media! Everything people post is 100% true, right?
3. You are a social being.
Unless you enjoy going to expensive events to hear VoiceVIP’s talk about themselves and plug their books, you’re pretty much on your own in this business. I mean, who likes being locked up between the four carpeted walls of a 3.5’ by 3.5’ recording booth all day long?
You have no one to talk to but yourself, and you’ll never see a response from the people you’re supposedly entertaining. If acknowledgment is what you’re secretly longing for, wait for the Corona crisis to be over and go to a nursing home and read to the residents. Tell stories to kids in the cancer ward. It will make their day, and yours!
The sedentary lifestyle of a typical voice-over is unhealthy for the mind, body, and soul. It’s bad enough that you have to stay at home to stay safe these days. Let’s assume you’re an extrovert and you thrive in the company of others.
I can tell you right now that you will curse the day you decided to lock yourself up in a walk-in closet, just so you could narrate some third-rate novel for a royalty share that doesn’t even pay this month’s water bill.
4. You’ll spend at least 80% of your time trying to get work, and 20% doing the work.
Voice-overs spend a lot of time being busy without being productive. How rewarding is that? Regardless of what voice casting sites want you to believe, most jobs you audition for will go to someone else, and you’ll never know why. Don’t you love it?
But what about agents, you may ask. Once you have an agent or two, things will get better, right?
No they won’t.
The pickings are slim, and these days, all the agents in North America will send the same bathroom tissue script to every talent with a potty mouth. That really makes you feel part of an exclusive club, doesn’t it?
5. It may take many years before you see a return on your investment, if you’re lucky.
A voice-over career cannot be bought. It has to be conquered. Slowly.
You may think you’re going to be successful because of your unique sound. Dream on! The only way you’ll stand a chance is if you stop treating your pipe dream as a hobby. This means you’ve got to invest in professional gear and in a quiet place to record ($$$). Then you have to get yourself a few top-notch demos, plus a website to tell the world what you’re doing ($$$).
And this is just the beginning.
Having all of that in place is no guarantee that you’ll make any money with your voice. Thousands of people all over the world are doing exactly what you do, and they are giving up within a year. The only money they’ll ever see is when they’re selling their stuff on eBay. At a loss.
When you really think about it, you have to be an idiot to become a voice over.
I was foolish enough to choose that as my career, and guess what?
I’ve never been happier!
PS If you believe I’m being negative for no reason, you should read 5 awful things nobody tells you about being an actor. Then we’ll talk, okay?