You’ve probably heard the story of the priest who preached the same sermon every Sunday.
After a few weeks, some of the parishioners got tired of it and demanded an explanation.
“Do you really want to know why I’m repeating myself at every service?” asked the priest. The crowd nodded.
“I will continue to tell you the same thing over and over again, until you take it to heart and do something with it.
If you don’t change your behavior, I don’t see any reason for me to change my sermon.”
Well, I may be the son of a minister, but as a blogger, I can certainly relate to this priest. When it comes to setting rates, I sometimes feel I’m talking to a sea of people with frighteningly short memories and no backbone.
Watch me as I go to my pulpit and address the crowd:
FELLOW FREELANCERS, do you know how much you’re worth?
Do you have a good sense of how much to charge when a client asks you for a quote? Do you have an idea of how much your full-time colleagues are charging… nationally and internationally?
If you don’t, you shouldn’t even think of responding to that online job offer. Don’t you dare come up with an estimate. You have no business being in business until you’ve figured out a basic fee structure.
Imagine going to a photographer to get your headshot taken. Of course you want to know ho much it is going to cost. “Well, let me get back to you on that,” is not the answer you expect to hear from a pro, is it?
How on earth are you going to determine your basic rate?
Let me get one thing out of the way first. It’s not the responsibility of your clients to offer you a good rate. It would be the decent thing to do, but it’s your job to negotiate a fair fee.
That fee is determined by how much you need to make in order to survive and by how much you want to make in order to thrive (today and 30 years from now).
In my experience, most freelancers aren’t capable of giving a clear answer to both questions. Can you? If not, you’re running your business based on guesswork and you’re setting yourself up to be taken advantage of.
Your rate should be high enough for clients to take you seriously, and reasonable enough to still attract business in your segment of the market.
As a beginner, here’s the worst thing you could do: trying to break into the business by working for stupendously low rates. If you don’t know what I mean by a low rate, it’s time you do your homework. Don’t you know that low rates flag you as an amateur?
If you want to be a pro, grow up and act like it!
It is self-evident that as a beginner you’re not yet in a position to command top-dollar, top-euro or whatever currency you prefer. But that doesn’t mean that you should sell yourself short and become a predatory pricer.
Predatory Pricing is the practice of selling a product or service at a very low price, intending to drive competitors out of the market. It is a strategy for losers and I’ll tell you why.
• Bargain prices attract bargain shoppers. Low paying customers are usually high maintenance customers. Now, you can either believe me, or find it out the hard way. Your choice.
• Secondly, people tend to not value things that don’t cost them much, and they’re much more likely to be dissatisfied with it – regardless of the quality of the product.
• Third: you will attract clients that expect a gourmet meal at a fast food price (and at drive-through speed). As in mountain biking, it’s easier to go down than to go up. Once your price level is set, it is hard to justify a higher price.
• Fourth: predatory pricing is unfair competition. I work as a voice-over professional. A lot of people are complaining that there’s no money in voice-overs these days. I know I’m not the only game in town. Anyone with a mic and a computer can enter this business. While the cost of living is going up, rates are steadily going down.
Dumping your product or service will isolate you from your colleagues and it will negatively impact prevalent prices. Don’t blame the anonymous forces of demand and supply for a steady decline in rates. You are as much part of the problem as you are a part of the solution.
• Last but not least: show some self-respect! If you don’t value your own work, why should I? You have a unique talent. You have invested so much time and money in making it this far. Why would you want to put yourself up for sale in the bargain basement? Don’t you deserve better than that?
Now here’s a question for you:
Would you charge the same fee for the same type of work to a client in Europe and let’s say India?
If you don’t know the answer, that’s okay. Just stop reading and think about it for a moment. The internet has turned every business into a global business. Sooner or later, you’ll have to deal with this issue.
Have you ever heard of the Big Mac index, the Tall Latte index or the iPod index? Clever economists came up with these lists after a lot of hands-on research to illustrate the idea that identical goods have different prices in different markets.
Prices are based on a local standard of living, the price of raw materials, transportation, labor, taxes and frankly, on what companies feel they can get away with. That’s why pharmaceutical companies sell the same drugs at different prices in different countries.
Economically speaking, the product or service you provide is no different than a burger, a cup of coffee or an iPod, iPad or an eye-liner. That means that your client in India is likely to have a different budget than your client in Denmark.
Whether or not you want to work for that budget, is up to you.
You know what you’re worth.
If you’re okay with an Indian salary as a US-based freelancer, just tell me how you intend to make ends meet in the States. I don’t think your local gas station has started accepting rupees yet. But let’s make a deal. Once you’ve chosen to accept a low rate, stop contaminating social media with complaints that it’s so hard to earn a living.
By the way, I don’t blame a Chinese company for trying to hire talent at the lowest possible price. They’re probably working for a US-based firm that has outsourced certain activities because labor is cheap. After all, we all want our Black Friday bargains, so we’re driving that demand for cheap products and services.
I do blame North American or European clients that are trying to make us work for rates that would be only be acceptable in countries like India. I also blame online job boards that enable those clients to set these bargain basement rates. And lastly, I blame so-called colleagues who willingly devalue our business by accepting jobs at these rates.
So, how do you determine your fee in an international context?
Let’s recap. First you have to know what your bottom line is before you do anything else. In other words: how much would you minimally need to charge to turn a profit? You are running a for-profit business, aren’t you?
Once your bottom line is covered, find out how much this particular job would be worth in the country of the client. If you can live with that rate, that’s where you want your quote to be… minimally!
Don’t quote that German client 250 US dollars if the going rate in Germany is 250 Euro. Why should you leave any money on the table?
If you start working for less, don’t be surprised that this same client will post his next project for 180 Euro. After all: we teach people how to treat us, and this is how rates go down. Clients aren’t stupid.
And remember: just because a client needs you, doesn’t mean they can afford you, or that you can afford to work for them.
If you would charge $1000 for a project, and they’re willing to pay $800, it’s totally worthwhile to see if you can meet in the middle. But don’t spend any time trying to sell champagne to someone on a beer budget, no matter where they live.
These would-be customers don’t care that you’re using the latest equipment or that you recently completed a project for a prestigious brand.
They just want to know how low you’re willing to go.
Got it?
Thus endeth my sermon.
Go in peace, and may you lead a prolific and prosperous life!
(and don’t make me post the same story next week, okay?)
“I’m being offered $200 to record a 120-thousand word audio book. Do you think that’s a fair rate?”
“A client wants me to voice a movie trailer for $150. Should I do it?”
Not a day goes by without someone asking these types of questions on Facebook, LinkedIn and now on Google+ (the latest way to go around in circles).
Sometimes I stick my neck out and I respond to these questions; especially when I get sentimental and remember the early days of my career.
I was young and unafraid and incredibly ignorant. Back then there was no Internet. Picking brains became my specialty.
On other days I’m not so sappy, as I remember the kind words of my business coach:
“If you’re a Pro, you know what you’re worth. If you’re not, go do you your own homework! You won’t learn a thing if I hand you everything on a silver platter.”
He was right.
These days, getting info has never been easier. Search Google for voiceover rates. You’ll get about 1,370,000 results in 0.15 seconds. How’s that for starters?
MONEY TALKS
Bringing up rates usually spells trouble. Talent likes them to go up; clients love paying less. Where to begin?
The Freemarketeers will tell you to leave everything up to the unregulated forces of supply and demand. After all, it worked well for subprime mortgages, didn’t it? The Interventionists fear a free fall for all. They want rates to be regulated.
Unfortunately, it’s not that black-and-white. Voice-Over rates reflect many variables, and -unless you belong to a union or you have an agent- it can be tough to put a price on your pipes.
Enter a parade of Pay to Plays. You pay for the privilege of being offered the opportunity to audition and bid for projects (together with thousands of other privileged colleagues). Here’s the catch.
As a member, you often have to subject yourself to an agreed price range per project deemed reasonable by that site. Whether or not you choose to accept that range depends on your personal Price Floor.
A Price Floor is a point below which a product or service should not be sold, or else you’d incur a loss. I bet you anything that most people reading these words right now, have no clue what their price floor actually is.
Be honest. Do you?
A EUROPEAN PERSPECTIVE
If you’ve visited my blog before, you know that I have written about U.S.-based voice casting sites and their perceived influence on dwindling voice-over rates.
On January 8th, 2008, a new player entered the market: Bodalgo. Based in Germany, Bodalgo is the brain child of a man who once had a very boring job as the deputy editor of Penthouse: Armin Hierstetter.
Armin’s no dummy.
He studied the existing P2P’s carefully, as he set out to take the good and improve the bad to create something beautiful. Unlike similar sites, Bodalgo is available in German, Spanish, Italian and English (American and British).
Now, if you think that you can buy your way into Bodalgo, you are wrong. No matter the credit limit on your Visa Card, if you sound like crap, you can’t join the club.
Bodalgo caters to clients from all over the world, but because it’s based in Bavaria, it’s a gateway to the European voice-over market. This brings me back to rates. How does Bodalgo compare to its American counterparts?
I (PS) decided to check in with the boss: Armin Hierstetter (AH). Here’s a transcript of the interview:
PSI just saw a project posted on your site in the 100-250 USD range. It made me think: Is Bodalgo going in the direction of its American counterparts, or did I miss something? Has $100 always been the minimum?
AH In USD the minimum range starts at 100 dollars (the Euro has a 50 to 150 minimum range as – for example – a local radio spot in Germany is usually 50 to 55 Euro).
If jobs are posted that are budgeted too low (intentionally or not), Bodalgo contacts the voice-seeker suggesting what we believe is a fair rate. Sometimes the voice-seeker sees our point and is willing to raise the budget, sometimes not. If the voice-seeker does not agree on increasing the budget, the job simply does not get posted. Period.
Of course, we hear many times:
“What? You want me to pay 250 USD for a job that is done in five minutes? You must be insane, you [censored]“
Well, depending on my mood, I sometimes try to explain why voiceovers cost what they cost (knowing that with these types of folks it really does not help at all in most cases), or I simply press the delete button and go on with whatever I am doing.
PSBodalgo’s been in business for a few years now. What’s your overall take on how voice-over rates are established and where they are going?
AH There are many factors when it comes to rates. Here are few of them (this is by no means meant to be a complete list):
Your voice:
Experience
Skills
Uniqueness (most important if you ask me)
Your studio:
Equipment
Recording skills
Other factors:
Currencies
Inflation
I see a link between equipment becoming more powerful yet more affordable, and declining voice-over rates. Let me share three trends with you:
1. The costs for your own studio are coming down, so you can make this beneficial for your clients as well;
2. Because many talents build their own studios, there is much more competition which also leads to lower prices. That’s how the market works.
PSSorry to interrupt, but clients are saving money due to the increase in home studios. No longer do they need to pay for studio time, an audio engineer/editor and a director.
It is my impression that these savings are simply pocketed and not passed on to the voice talent. In the end, we end up doing more for less. Shouldn’t this give us some leverage to raise our rates?
Armin Hierstetter
AH I fully understand that voice-seekers already save a lot of money because they’re used to getting the finished audio from the talent without paying for a studio.
I want to be honest with you. I really think that’s one of the biggest mistakes talents have made for a very long time: They did not charge properly for the studio work, only for the rate as a talent. It will be VERY difficult to change this to an approach where talent charges their normal rate plus editing costs;
3. More and more people of the type “My friends all tell me I should host a radio show,” buy a Shure SM58 microphone and think that their laptop recording is god’s gift to the audio world. Untrained amateurs seem to flood the market.
What’s worse, there are many voice-seekers out there that listen to crap demos thinking they are actually good, because they don’t have a proper recording at hand to compare.
But one thing is for sure: Bodalgo will never start to accept amateurs. Yes, there are a few talents with Bodalgo that have just slipped through the net that might not have passed if I had been pickier the day I activated their accounts. Still, the level of Bodalgo’s talent is much, much, much higher than with any other Pay2Play site that we’ve come across.
PSWhat’s your advice on how to best play the game? Everybody loves to win an audition, but not at any rate. Do you expect voice-over rates to go up any time soon?
AH If you ask me, the reasons why rates should go up are purely to be seen in costs of living. If those prices would be stable, I’d say it’s fair to assume that our rates would stay stable as well.
With financial markets facing the issues they face at the moment, including all the effects like higher inflation, increased costs for energy, food, rent etcetera, I think that we’ll see rates rising over the next years to cover the rising living expenses.
PSInflation correction keeps rates at the same level. Talent won’t be making more just because the number on a check is higher. If we wish to increase the amount of money coming in, we need to compensate for the rise in the cost of living, and add e.g. 10% to whatever we’re charging.
AH Well, U.S.-based talent benefits from the weak dollar when paid in Euros by Euro-Zone clients. The opposite is true for Euro-Zone-Talent paid in USD. U.S. clients will not accept higher USD prices just because of exchange rates. It’s really just bad luck for us Euro-Talents. And – if you ask me – the U.S.-Dollar will become much weaker over the next months and years (but that’s a different topic).
So, to cut a long story short: Yes, I see higher rates over the next years. But this is only because everything else will go up in price as well.
PSSo, how can we best prepare for the tough years that are ahead of us?
AH 1. If you have not done so already, invest in your own studio.
2. Buy the good stuff (like Neumann or Brauner for mics, for example) as it will serve you well many, many years. Personally, I would no longer waste money on analog equipment. I would solely buy digital stuff (like the TLM 103 D from Neumann).
PSQuality equipment is essential, but owning a state of the art camera does not make one a top-notch photographer.
AH I do appreciate that a cool mic does not make a great voice talent, but this is not where I am coming from at all. I am just a firm believer that successful talent simply needs both: A well-trained voice and great equipment to deliver high-quality audio. There are too many Samsung USB mics out there in my opinion.
I know, of course, that those top shelf brands are pricey. But when you look at what you (and your client) get for the money – it turns out to be an excellent investment.
3. LEARN HOW TO RECORD PROPERLY!!! It’s really, really, really (I mean it) horrible to hear how bad, bad, bad many of the auditions are recorded (hiss, bad miking, bad levelling, bad everything). Use proper headphones to proof-listen your recordings and be super critical about the work you deliver.[Armin insisted this should be printed in bold]
PSCan Bodalgo keep both voice-seekers and voice talent equally happy, or is that impossible?
AH That’s easy: Our main goal is to attract more and more voice-seekers that post sanely budgeted jobs. We want to provide them with the easiest solution available to find high-quality talent without paying any commission. That way, both sides will win.
PS Herzlichen Dank, Armin.
You can reach Armin at armin@bodalgo.com. He is planning to do regular screen casts/vlogs in German and in English, and pass on his take on topics relevant to voice talent.
It’s time to tackle one of the most frustrating issues in the voice-over business.
It’s particularly frustrating because in all the years that I have been a VO-pro, I have seen little or no change. Voice-seekers are just not getting it and voice talents are putting up with it like meek sheep.
Before I tell you what the issue is, imagine for a moment, being lead into a pitch dark room. In this room -so you are told- you will find a dart board, but it could be anywhere.
You are given no more than one dart and one instruction: you must hit the bull’s eye. If you don’t, you won’t be given a second chance and all your time and energy is wasted. Questions are out of the question. You are on your own.
Let me ask you this:
How great do you think your chances are to hit that bull’s eye?
Pretty slim, don’t you think?
And yet, day in day out, hundreds of people audition for voiceover jobs of which they have just as little information as someone playing darts in the dark. It’s a risky undertaking. Someone might get hurt. But no one seems to care.
OUR BEST SHOT
How are we expected to give it our best shot if we have little or no clue where the target is and what it looks like? Without a clear destination and a detailed map, it’s almost inevitable to get lost.
And by the way, do you know who the worst offenders are? The people looking for international voices!
Take your typical voice-over job listing. With a little bit of luck it will tell you what it’s for: a video, eLearning, a commercial. If you’re even luckier, it will ask for a specific gender and age range. Now comes the tricky part: language.
For the sake of the argument I will focus on English, but what I have to say also applies to Spanish, Arabic and many other languages.
What goes through your mind when you see that a voice-seeker only lists “English”?
Could they be looking for a talent from Calcutta or for a voice-over from down-under? Should I send an English demo with a touch of Dutch, or would they prefer her Majesty’s English?
And here’s the latest trend: “Neutral English.”
What the heck is “Neutral English”? Where is it spoken? Is there a Rosetta Stone training I could take?
ASK MR. BODALGO
I asked Armin Hierstetter to weigh in on the issue. He’s the boss at Bodalgo, an online voice-over casting site. He’s actually a funny man… for a German, that is. He said jokingly:
“Neutral English” is spoken in “Neutristan,”
and he continued:
“Seriously: Many times clients do not care from where exactly the English is coming from (US, UK, South Africa, Australia). Still, they want a native speaker who – in an ideal world – makes it difficult to judge where exactly she/he is coming from. That’s what a client means by Neutral English.
A casting labeled “Neutral English” will go out to all matching talents that have one of the following as one of their mother tongues: American English, British English, Australian English, South African English etcetera.”
Although I understand what Armin is trying to say, I still don’t get it. To me, it sounds like a contradiction in terms to -on one hand- ask for a native speaker, but to request that one shouldn’t be able to tell exactly where he/she is coming from.
First off, an accent is nothing but a way of pronouncing a language. Accent specialist Pamela Vanderway defines it as: ‘Characteristic Pronunciation‘. It is therefore impossible to speak without an accent. No one is neutral.
Secondly, from a marketing and branding perspective, why would someone want ‘neutral’? Neutral is like cooking without salt and spices; it’s like painting without colors or the equivalent of annoying Muzak in the elevator. Neutral is boring.
THE MESSAGE AND THE MESSENGER An accent can have a huge impact on how a message is perceived. The choice of voice can be just as important as a company logo or the look of an on-camera actor. It can dramatically increase sales and improve conversion rates. That’s why car companies hire A-list actors such as Jeff Bridges and Robert Downey Jr. to do their voice-overs.
It’s not up to me to teach advertisers or communication managers how to do their job, but to have no voice or accent preference seems to be counter-intuitive.
Third, by opening an audition up to ALL English speakers, the voice-seekers are creating more work for themselves. Theoretically, they are opening the door to auditions from Mumbai, Sidney, Houston, Johannesburg, Amsterdam, Glasgow, Dublin etcetera. Is that really what they want?
Wouldn’t it be much easier and more efficient to specifically describe the voice type, the accent and the read they need? It’s like giving voice actors a map to reach their destination. Why not switch on the light? Otherwise, we’ll end up taking shots in the dark, hoping for the best.
So, here’s the 64 thousand dollar question:
How do you approach an audition for a Neutral English speaker?
In the ideal world, you’d talk to your client and find out what they really want. That’s business 101. Never assume. Always ask. Here are a few “double-nots”:
Don’t assume that they don’t want an American accent if the commercial is released in the UK;
Don’t assume that you should not use your British accent if the video is for the U.S. market. Most Americans love British accents. Some even think it makes you sound smarter;
Don’t assume that making assumptions is going to lead to anything.
If you’re in a position to have a real conversation with your client (what a concept!), ask what it is that they’ll be listening for. Get specifics.
Sometimes clients will tell you: “I really like the voice of Ricky Gervais or John Cleese or David Attenborough. Could you try to get close to that?”
Unfortunately, online voice casting sites explicitly forbid you to contact a voice-seeker directly. So, here are three audition strategies that might just work for you if you’re not sure which way to go with neutral English:
1. MORE = MORE: Record multiple versions of the script using different accents and send it as one file. Give yourself a second chance to make a first impression!
2. ALL OR NOTHING: Make a bold choice, rather than focusing on neutralizing your accent. Make your demo absolutely unforgettable. Clients don’t always know what they want until they hear it. That’s how I shop for clothes. I have no idea what I’m looking for until I see exactly what I want.
3. BLEND IN: Create your own version of ‘neutral’ by blending various accents in your merry voice-over mixer. Rather than giving your clients tulips, you hand them a bouquet of different flowers. I sometimes call my particular accent “Northern European English”.
I can already hear some of you saying: “That’s great advice but does it really work?”
Of course it works, and most of the time it doesn’t.
I once auditioned for a job that -surprise, surprise- came with very detailed instructions. In other words: I knew exactly what to aim for, and my always brutally honest agent said I’d “nailed neutral”.
However, in spite of my intergalactic talent, the client didn’t pick me. A month later I actually heard the commercial I had auditioned for and my jaw dropped to the floor.
The voice they had chosen didn’t sound like the voice they had asked for at all. It couldn’t be more different. The colleague that was chosen for this very lucrative ad had tried the ALL OR NOTHING approach and ended up a winner.
Life is unfair.
Then I remembered the wise words of Internet Voice Coach David Rosenthal. He said:
“It’s not about rejection. It’s all about selection.”
That’s typical David. He always knows how to make me feel better about not feeling very good.
Spice it up
Here’s the thing: sometimes ‘neutral’ leads to nothing. So, take a risk. Get out of your comfort zone. Do something that is embarrassingly silly. Who cares? It’s between you and your mic.
Robin Williams, Eddie Murphy and Mike Meyers make millions doing voice-overs. Would they be where they are today, had they gone for ‘neutral’? I don’t even think they could pull that off. I wouldn’t pay ten bucks to hear them be boring and bland. That’s like going to a fancy bar and ordering tap water. It defeats the purpose.
So, if you happen to hire voices, I have a message for you:
We can read your script but we can’t read your mind.
Please be clear about what you want. Otherwise you’ll end up listening to 100 plus auditions that miss the mark and you have not only wasted your time, but the time of all those hard-working hopefuls that poured their hearts and souls into that audition.
If you’re a voice talent, do yourself a favor. Even if the script calls for ‘neutral,’ add some pizzazz to your demo. Kick it up a notch. Use some garlic and red pepper. Sprinkle it with emotion. Layer it with devotion. Record a few versions and send them all into the universe.
Something strange and unexpected has happened. Thanks to the growing popularity of this blog, some of my readers now write to me saying:
“Dear Mr. Nethervoice, I enjoy your articles but I never knew you were into voice-overs as well. For how long have you been gracing this world with the sweet, seductive sound of your pleasantly persuasive pipes?”
At that point, I patiently explain that I’ve been working the mic since I was 17, and some three years later I’m still at it. Well, that’ s not entirely true. I feel and act like I’m seventeen… most of the time. Of course information about my illustrious career has been available on other pages of my blog. You know, the ones next to this text that nobody bothers to read.
Since every question is a golden opportunity to enlighten my fans, colleagues and clients alike, I will do something I have never done before, at least not this openly.
For once, I will shamelessly sing my own praises, and if you’re not comfortable with that, I shall retreat into a corner and weep bitter tears of shame and disappointment… and proceed as planned! After all, who is going to stop me?
This is me in a nutshell:
full-time voice-over artist and writer
records in English, Dutch (mother tongue) and German
most in-demand accent: “neutral” or “European” English
specialty: intelligent international narration
impressive clients: Novartis, Deloitte, Plantronics, Farmers Life
Favorite quote: “Your voice is like velcro. Whatever you say sticks.”
Based on that last line, I should perhaps go by the surname of Stick-worda.
GUIDED TOUR Now that we’ve made our formal acquaintance, allow me to take you on a quick tour of some of my voice-over projects.
The Dutch are known for being great ice skaters. This is me, telling them about another exciting sport: skate boarding!
On to another mode of transportation. Here’s the only Dutch commercial I ever recorded for the black market:
Ready to get more mileage out of your gas tank? Then you should listen to “Muzzle the Guzzle: 50 Fuel Saving Strategies” by Michael Minsky.
This audio book received an average rating of 4.67 out of 5 stars on the earth-shattering Audible.com Richter scale. Narrated in English by yours truly.
On to other modes of transportation.
Andreas Klauser
Meet Andreas Klauser. He’s the President and CEO for CASE IH, one of one of the world’s largest brands of agriculture equipment.
Born and educated in Austria, Mr. Klauser is a native German speaker. CASE IH asked me to dub a series of meet the CEO-videos, as the voice of Mr. Klauser… in German, that is! Kein Problem für mich!
click on image for video
The Austrian ski resort of Zauchensee is one of the hidden treasures of the Alps. Not for long, if it’s up to me.
narrated by Paul Strikwerda
The Austrian economist Ludwig von Mises was one of the most influential proponents of Liberalism.
Jörg Guido Hülsmann, professor of economics at the University of Paris, tells the full story of his dramatic and inspiring life and contributions in a 1143-page biography.
The Von Mises Institute commissioned me to record the complete audio version of this masterpiece (some 20+ hours) and next week, work will start on a second book.
The Wharton School is the business school of the University of Pennsylvania, an Ivy League university in Philadelphia. Wharton is the world’s first collegiate business school and the first business school in the United States.
I’ll tell you more about Wharton in this presentation:
Haliotika in Brittany (France), offers everything to do with sea fishing, including displays of boats, fish varieties, interactive education for children and boat rides. A very fishy place, indeed.
Take the audio tour, and you’ll hear me as the German voice of Philippe and Claude, two local fishermen talking about net profit.
Children at Camp Gurs
Camp Gurs was an internment and refugee camp constructed by the French government in 1939. In 1940, it became a concentration camp for Jews of any nationality except French, as well as people considered dangerous by the government. I was honored to narrate the German audio tour.
click for quick tour
This Dutch company has produced an ingenious interactive digital movie course. It contains a large collection of known and unknown film clips from 1878 up to the present day.
Each clip is an example of a new discovery in cinematography: editing, camera movement, image cutouts, sound, talkies, color film, acting method, etcetera. This time, I step into the role of English tour guide.
Speaking of tours, we all have our dream homes. I happen to have quite a few of them and thanks to Spartina Studios, I get to be the host of many of Connecticut’s most precious properties. Here’s one of these humble abodes:
There’s no doubt about it: video increases home sales as long as it’s done right. That’s why I have written “Real Estate Videos & Voice Overs,” a white paper for videographers and real estate agents.
Some people still believe that voice-overs is all about doing silly voices (click here for more misconceptions). Well, sometimes it is! Who would have thought that a Dutchman would ever dub Johnny Depp?
Here’s a video I voiced for an insurance company. It will never win a prize for best animation, but I sure had a blast doing both voices! (the fun starts at 0:53)
This paint of this last video is still wet. Made in Kibbutz Gat, it tells the story of a multi-national company most of you have probably never heard of. It’s in Dutch, so I’ll leave it up to you to figure this one out!
Well, that’s all folks!
Thank you so much for enduring this exercise in self-indulgence. I admire your persistence and perseverance. Now you can go back to your daily chores as you reminisce about the delectable servings of eye and ear candy I had the pleasure of serving up for you.
I’m just going to look and listen to all the videos one last time…
I have a confession to make. Since June of this year, I’ve been leading a double life. Only a select group of readers has been aware of my secret activities. Today, I decided it was time to reveal my hidden identity and share what you have been missing all these months. So, what’s the deal?
In May, Internet Voice Coach (IVC) founder David Rosenthal asked me to join his team as a regular contributor on ‘all things international’. Since then, I have been publishing an article about the industry every other week, as well as interviews with movers and shakers in different parts of the world.
Because IVC is a subscription site ($99 for a year), I wanted to give non-members a better idea of the kind of things you will find on Internet Voice Coach, such as my interview with actress Claire Dodin. Enjoy!
The French Connection…
When Claire Dodin was about seven years old, her mother built a theater in the attic of their apartment. Claire and her sister started putting on plays for her friends. Claire: “It was such a happy time, and I decided I’d just have to play for the rest of my life!”
Fast-forward a few years, and you’ll find that Claire is as much at home in front of a camera as she is behind a mic. Born and raised in France, this actress, model, singer and voice-over talent moved to the UK before she made Los Angeles her home.
Bi-lingual, multi-talented and exceptionally professional, Claire has done well for herself. Her story is one of dedication, discipline and of following your dreams.
PS Let’s pretend that I’m a client and your agent had 30 seconds to describe Claire Dodin to me. How would your agent “sell” you?
CD I guess he would say that I’m versatile; I can handle pretty much anything, and can do several character voices including children’s voices. He’d probably tell you that I’ve voiced several jobs for Disney and the X-Box 360, and that I usually don’t need a lot of takes to please the clients. That’s why everyone wants to work with me again.
PS Percentagewise, how much of your career is taken up by voice-over work?
CD In the acting business things are always changing and moving. There can be months when all I do is voice-overs, and months when I’m shooting film after film and I don’t have much time for voice-overs. This always makes me sad because I have to pass on really fun jobs. There simply isn’t enough time to do everything. I have to turn down so much work, mainly due to lack of availability.
I would say that on average, voice-overs represent about 70% of my income and maybe 30% of my time. It always makes me laugh that it costs more to get only my voice, than to have me on camera!
Having said that, it can happen that a week goes by and there’s nothing; not one job offer. Then I start thinking that it’s all over and that I will never work again! It’s the nature of being self-employed. Nothing is ever set in stone. No one is ever entirely safe. You’re fashionable one week; the week after you’re not.
That’s why it’s so important that we value ourselves and feel an inner sense of security, and not let our job define who we are. Otherwise it becomes impossible to handle the stress. Luckily, a job always seems to come along when I need it.
PS Speaking of voice-over projects, what are you most proud of and why?
CD There are quite a few jobs I’m very proud of like the French-speaking FisherPrice cuddly bear who says things like “I love you, hug me…”. Just thinking about it makes me smile. It’s the cutest thing ever! Or being on the Statue of Liberty tour in New York and being in the gardens of Versailles in Paris. I just love that my voice is over there! Next I want to be at the Taj Mahal!
But the job I’m the most proud of right now is my Zombiepodcast in which I’m a series regular. It’s called “We’re Alive” and I play Riley. The scripts are fabulous and the production quality amazing. It’s an honor to be part of it.
We have reached over 600,000 downloads with the first season! We’ve won the Gold Ogle Award 2010, the Communicator Award 2010 and we were a finalist for the Parsec Award 2010. The episode submitted for these, is one that is centered around my character, which makes me even happier! The second season has begun, and it’s free to listen to, so catch up with the episodes now!
PS Let’s talk about accent. Some people believe that -in order to make it as a foreign actor in another country- you need to get rid of your accent. Others believe your accent is what sets you apart. Where do you stand?
CD Well, I am not able to put on a convincing British or American accent, so I don’t even try. I believe clients would go for native speakers anyway, so it really doesn’t matter. When I get hired for an English job, they want my accent, because it sets me apart from everyone else. Sometimes they want a stronger French accent, which I can tone up or down. Sometimes, they just want a very clear English accent with a hint of French.
Accents are great, as long as the diction is excellent and people can understand it. That’s where many foreign voices fail: they are not clear enough. I only started booking work in English regularly, after years of working at speaking more clearly. It’s not as easy as it sounds.
PS Does another accent come naturally to you, or do you have to work with a coach to get it right?
CD I do work with a coach for accent reduction when a part requires it, but it is never for voice acting, always for on-camera. In the voice-over world, if they want a British voice, they’ll hire a British voice. Nowadays, it’s so easy to get a native speaker.
Accents do not come naturally to me. It’s very difficult if you were not immersed in foreign sounds as a child. In France, all TV programs and most films are dubbed. I pretty much never heard English sounds before moving to England. It’s different in other countries like Sweden or The Netherlands. That’s why the Swedes and the Dutch are usually much better at accents than French people.
PS Do Europeans have an advantage over Americans when it comes to foreign languages and accents?
CD Being European in America is certainly an advantage because there are fewer of us, and Americans love European accents. If you are an American in America, there are hundreds of other people who sound exactly like you, so it’s harder.
This is where personality is incredibly important, because in reality, there is only one of each of us. And we hear so much that we need to sound like this or this… In truth, what will make you book the job is YOU; your quirkiness, your own little things that most people are trying to get rid of. Keep them (but use the correct techniques)!
Being French in a foreign country has absolutely made my career. I was working as an on-camera actress in the UK, and people found me because they needed a French voice and couldn’t get one.
That’s how I landed my first jobs. Then I thought that maybe I should get an agent, so I sent samples of the jobs I had done. I didn’t have a demo at the time, and pretty much all the agents wanted to sign me and I started booking national jobs straight away. I think I recorded my first demo a couple of years later. I was very lucky. To this day, jobs still come to me. I don’t have to work very hard at getting them. I am in a very fortunate position. There isn’t much competition.
PS You have lived and worked in the UK and now you’re in LA. These days, we’re all connected via the Internet. Does location matter anymore?
CD Unfortunately, location still matters a lot. I’m hoping that clients will get used to ISDN, but today, most major clients want to meet up with the voices at the studio. This means that by moving to LA, I’ve lost most of the work I was getting in London. When I go back there for a week, suddenly I’ve got bookings every day in London studios. They haven’t forgotten me, but they want me there in person.
It’s the same in France, I know several people who would hire me regularly, but they want me in the studio in Paris. I imagine that it is the same for Los Angeles and New York.
Of course there are many jobs we can do remotely, but they rarely are high end. I once did a six months national radio campaign for the UK, and the client was happy to do it via ISDN for each recording. This was an exception, and I think it was because it was for radio. In the UK, most radio ads are recorded via ISDN. But for TV, you have to be in the room with them. I did record the Versailles job at my LA studio though, so sometimes it can happen if they really want you.
PS How do you get work, these days?
CD The reality of the business is that most voice-over talents audition every day. I’m in a very different position. The vast majority of the work I do, comes from direct offers via my agents, or directly from existing clients or new clients through referral/reputation.
It may sound strange to American voice talents, but I did not audition for any of the national commercials I did, video games, TV documentaries, high profile jobs… That’s the way they do it in Europe: we get hired based on our demo or based on a recommendation from our agent or producers/sound engineers. I did however audition for the Fisher Price toys I voiced, but they paid me for the audition and then hired me. I also auditioned for the Versailles job, but they had specifically asked for me.
I think that the system works differently in America. Even established talents have to audition. That being said, I have many American clients that don’t ask me to audition either. I’m glad it works this way because I usually don’t have time to audition. When happen to I have spare time, I will record some open auditions, but this rarely leads to work (funny, no?). That’s the problem with open auditions: they don’t want You; they want A voice, and usually the cheapest one.
PS Do clients, agents, producers and directors have different expectations based on where they’re located? Do you approach an audition differently based on the country and culture?
CD Actually, everyone wants the best product at the best price as fast as possible pretty much everywhere. What may be different is the style of the voice-overs. For example, I find that promos and documentaries on US TV tend to have a “sensational” factor. In the UK they tend to be more casual/matter of fact. In France there’s also a distinctive sound for news or documentaries. The voice talent simply needs to adapt to the style of the country, but also to the medium and the client. Each job is different, which is part of the fun. For an audition, I try to find out as much as I can about the client and the target audience. That way, I can make a best guess as to what style is appropriate for the script.
PS This is a highly competitive business. Apart from talent and experience, what do you think is absolutely essential, in order to have an international voice-over career?
CDObviously, to have an international voice career it is essential to speak English, so you can communicate with clients anywhere (pretty much everyone will speak some English). Apart from that, you just need the same qualities that will make you a successful national talent, as well as a good marketing plan so people abroad know who you are.
The internet is an excellent medium, but it’s not essential. I know voice talents who have booked major international campaigns through their local agent. By local, I mean: one of the top agents in one of the top cities. It still seems difficult to book high profile work without one of these agents, and you can usually only sign with one of them if you live in one of the major cities. That would be Los Angeles or New York for America; London for the UK and Paris for France.
Of course there are rare exceptions. There are a few very successful voice talents who do not live in the major cities, but they used to live there at one point. They moved away, and kept their agents and clients thanks to an ISDN-line. I only know of one person who has always lived far away and who is hugely successful.
This will hopefully change in the future, as home studios are becoming as good as studios in the big cities. I think it will still take a while before major clients accept not meeting a voice talent in person. This is why Don LaFontaine had a limo, so he could quickly go from studio to studio to record several jobs a day. It would have been so much easier to have him in one studio and the other studios would connect via ISDN, but it didn’t work that way and he had to drive from place to place.
I wish things were different, but nowadays, the best jobs are still recorded in major studios in major cities.
PS What’s most overlooked by up and coming international talent?
CD Something that foreign voices often overlook is to have an English version of their website. I was once looking for an Italian voice, and all I could find were websites in Italian, which I don’t speak. Had they had an English version, I would have contacted them. But I couldn’t work out if they had a home studio etcetera.
Also, they should indicate their location on the website. I was looking to book voices to come to a London studio, and I didn’t know where they lived. I nearly booked a voice once; I was ready to pay for a ticket to Paris, when he told me he lived in a small town in France and it wasn’t possible to get to where he needed to be, fast enough.
Another voice that I thought was in London, turned out to have moved to Paris. So, keep the info on your website up to date. Location is a big one, not just for outside studio bookings, but so we know your time zone in case we want an ISDN booking or we need you for a rush job.
PS What do you tell people who think that voice-over work is easy money, and that basically anyone with a good voice could do this?
CD Ah, ah! It’s a tough question, I could probably write a book about it! Voice-over acting is an art and the voice is the tool. You might have a fabulous canvas, great paints and a brush, but how easy is it to paint something that will sell for a few hundreds or thousands of dollars and be exhibited in a museum? Hmmm… But if you work hard, learn skills and have talent, maybe you’ll make a living as a painter. Same thing for voice-overs. And a few gifted ones will make it to the top.
PS What technology can you not live without, and how has it helped you book clients?
CD The only technology I really need, is my computer for my emails and my phone so I can take bookings. That’s all. But, with my home studio I can record more jobs and make a better living. Some voice talents earn a lot more than I do, and don’t have one, so it’s not essential. However, other voice talents only work from home.
PS You work for clients on different continents in different time zones. On one hand you need to be accessible but on the other hand you can’t be available 24/7. How do you handle that?
CD Ah, ah! Another tough one! I don’t handle it; it’s a bit of a problem. I get called in the middle of the night (when I forget to switch the phone off), I wake up at 5am for an ISDN session and I sometimes record till midnight! I need to be better at saying “no” to clients and regulate my hours. But I’m weak when people are nice and need a favor. I try to schedule ISDN sessions with Europe starting at 8am, LA time. That’s the end of the day for them. It usually works.
PS How much did you map out your career? Did you follow a strict plan or is it more spontaneous, “go with the flow”?
CDAt first I just went with the flow: voice-overs came to me not once, not twice but many times. This is when I realized that I should pursue it. Somehow, people knew I had a gift for it, even before I knew it. Then I started buying equipment to record from home. When my agent asked me to, I upgraded my equipment. When clients asked me to, I got the ISDN. I guess I always go with the flow. I don’t force things, they just happen when they need to, but I’ve got my ears open and I’m listening to the signs that tell me in which direction I need to go to.
That said, when I do something, I don’t do it halfheartedly. When I made the decision to work from my home studio, I practiced a lot to learn how to use the equipment. I listened to other voices and took advice from many people. I took classes etcetera. It took me a long time before I was able to make a quality recording.
When I upgraded to ISDN, I asked an engineer to come and install it for me, and install my sound booth so the sound would be good enough. I also bought a Neumann microphone. What’s the point of connecting to another studio if your own sound isn’t as good?
So basically, every time the decision to go to the next step was made following the flow, but once the decision was made it was thought out and I followed a careful plan.
Being disciplined is absolutely essential if you work from home. It’s too easy to do something else if you don’t have a boss checking up on you, making sure that you are putting the hours in. You have to do it for yourself and be very organized. For me, one of the hardest things is to keep track of the jobs recorded, the invoices sent, the invoices paid/unpaid etc… I find the admin part the hardest.
When I get really busy, I forget to reply to emails that aren’t essential, like companies asking me to fill out forms and send demos for future jobs. Sometimes I struggle to find the time to send invoices. That’s not a good thing. Staying on top of the paperwork is not easy. I’m dreaming of the day I’ll be able to employ an assistant to do these things for me!
PS What’s the best advice anyone has ever given you in this business, and how has it helped you?
CD The best advice I was ever given, as far as performance is concerned, was:
“It’s not about you. It’s about the person you are talking to”.
This changed everything. I stopped watching and listening to myself. I stopped getting nervous and I became so much better.
The best business advice I was ever given, was to set up a website. I had no idea how important it was, until I did it, and it boosted my career immensely.
PS Many thanks Claire, and bonne chance!
TASTE TEST
As I said in the intro, this is just one of the many interviews, videos and articles you’ll find on Internet Voice Coach. IVC is not just a site for beginning or experienced voice actors. If you’re using your voice for a living and you want to learn how to use it effectively, you should check it out.
You’ll find a line-up of voice talent, producers, agents, casting directors and other industry experts, sharing their insights with humor and enthusiasm. Members receive personalized feedback and audio sample evaluations. And -last but not least- if you’ve been enjoying this Double Dutch blog, you’ll find much more of me on IVC!
Thanks to the internet, any business is now a global business. Getting through to non-native English speakers can be a serious challenge.
But just because your client knows a few English words, doesn’t mean he understands everything you’re saying.
Here’s how not to get lost in translation.
“I have a good one,” I said to my friend from France.
“Why do gun-carrying Americans usually wear short-sleeved shirts?”
“No idea,” he answered. “You tell me.”
“Because they believe in the right to bear arms.”
Silence…
“Sorry, but I don’t get it,” said Philippe. “Explain.”
“Well,” I said, “I can try, but I don’t think it would make the Second Amendment any funnier.”
“Oh, was it supposed to be funny?”
“Well, Philippe, some people think that puns are bad by definition.”
“What’s a pun?” Philippe wanted to know.
Have you ever had a conversation like that? All along you thought that you and your foreign friend were on the same page, but now you’re not even sure you’re reading the same book. How is that possible? Both of you speak English, don’t you?
ENGLISH RULES
I’ll be totally honest with you: native English speakers are spoiled rotten. Practically the whole planet has adopted your language as the lingua franca of business, and so you expect everyone to be on your page… linguistically and -dare I say- even culturally.
Not so fast, my Anglophone friends! There is a whole world out there of people who don’t get it that you don’t get it when they don’t get it… Got it?
Even though your mother tongue blasts out of every radio and television station 24/7, you shouldn’t automatically assume that we understand everything you say or write. You really have no idea how complicated Shakespeare’s language can be.
Take a simple word like “call.” Pick up Webster’s dictionary and you’ll find 15 definitions for the noun alone. That’s asking for trouble. Here are two actual mistranslations from movie and TV subtitles:
A priest explains “That’s when I got my call from God.”
The subtitle reads: “That’s when God telephoned me.”
A general has to decide whether or not to bomb an urban target, and he says: “It’s a tough call.”
The subtitle reads: “It’s hard to make a phone call.”
As someone who has been breathing in the English language from birth, it is almost impossible for you to imagine what life is like with English as your second or third language. That only changes once the tables are turned and you start learning another language yourself.
NO GAIN, NO PAIN
Imagine being in a crowded Parisian bakery to get some fresh bread. Suddenly, you are overcome by that embarrassing surge of helplessness, because your French vocabulary is still limited to that of a bedwetting toddler. All the locals are staring at you as you utter these infamous words, while pointing at a warm baguette:
“Pain pour moi madame. Merci.”
Painful, indeed.
Thank goodness the woman behind the counter was merciful.
GETTING DOWN TO BUSINESS
In my last article, I stressed the importance of following-up with your contacts. Today, I’ll take a closer look at written communication, in particular, when it comes to dealing with non-English speakers.
Even though I live and work on the East Coast of the U.S., fifty percent of my clients are on other continents and for many, English is a second or third language. That means that I constantly have to bridge the linguistic and cultural divide as I respond to job offers, negotiate rates or simply share information about my voice-over services. Because English isn’t my first language either, I might be more sensitive to translation issues.
This is what I have learned so far:
1. Beware of the power of The Written Word!
Isn’t it true that, although we provide less information, printed words always seem to carry more weight? Even though communication experts tell us that we convey most of our meaning through inflection and body language, somehow, the written word seems more authoritative. Especially when coming form a trustworthy source, people are not inclined to doubt what they read.
Case in point: when I published a completely fabricated story on an invention called “the Mic Warmer,” most of my readers fell for it, in spite of the fact that the news broke on April Fools’ Day. The next day I revealed and retracted the hoax and yet, the serious comments kept coming in. I still get emails from folks who want to know when the Mic Warmer will be on the market and how much it will cost.
The fact is: people believe what they want to believe and they are inclined to seek confirmation of those beliefs without verifying sources. We all know that President Obama is a Muslim, don’t we?
Who has time to fact-check those Tweets coming from ordinary people turned biased reporting bystanders? The need for speedy news flashes has taken precedence over the need for accurate information. It turns out, we can’t even trust news professionals anymore.
Mike Wise, a sports columnist at The Washington Post, was suspended after purposely spreading false information on Twitter (source) to prove that people would believe pretty much any tweet. Guess what? He was right. Other news outlets picked up his ‘scoop’ and ran with it, no questions asked.
Here’s one more reason why you should weigh the written word more carefully, not only as a reader.
The private is becoming increasingly more public. While spoken words disintegrate as soon as they are uttered, your emails could be kept for years. That hasty, silly comment you left online after you drank a glass of wine, still pops up when people Google your name… even after three years. Reputation management is booming because…
2. Readers are inclined to take the written word more literally.
People can’t see that twinkle in your eyes or hear the subtle sarcasm in your voice when they’re reading your email or text message. That’s why emoticons were invented. But is it professional to use a smiley face when you’re writing to that senior German project manager? Personally, I feel that emoticons should be sent back to where they came from: to the teenage chat rooms LOL.
The fact that the written word is taken literally, is also a reason why humor doesn’t work well. First of all, what seems hysterical to one person could be offensive to another. Secondly, as my conversation with Philippe illustrates, not everyone will be equally thrilled when you throw in a pun or two. Understanding wordplay requires a greater command of a language, as well as a more in-depth knowledge of a culture.
My advice: be personable but keep things business-like. And please consider this…
3. Manners Matter.
I can’t get over the fact that some folks can be downright rude in their writing. Call me old-fashioned, but I’m inclined to start a movement to bring the words “please” and “thank you” back into everyday language.
How much does it cost to be polite? How hard is it to treat people with a little respect? And what about all the name-calling?
Just because you are used to dealing with people on a first-name basis, doesn’t mean that the rest of the world has followed suit. In fact, you’ll find that -compared to the States- most countries are far more formal, and even more so in a business context.
If you’re not sure about the correct etiquette, err on the side of caution. As a rule of thumb, I always let the other party take the lead. If they wish to be addressed by their first name, believe me, they will let you know.
I also think it is a common courtesy to proof your messages before you send them. Cheq your grammer and speling. I know its nice to here from me, but your not looking very proffesional right now. Their you have it! Now, remember…
4. Keep your focus on the client.
Do yourself a favor and look at one of your most recent business emails. How many times did you count the word “I” in that message? What does that tell you? What could you have done differently to make that message less about you and more about your customer?
If you’re a follower of my tweets, you’ll have noticed that I started a “Less Self Campaign” in response to the ME, ME, ME mentality that has gone absolutely viral. I can understand that people are trying to market themselves using social ME-dia. But could you please stop quoting from that book called ‘my career’ all the time? In most cases, it’s rather thin and quite repetitive.
This is what I’d like to ask those Me, Me, Me-people:
Why do you feel the need to make yourself the center of the universe? Did your parents not love you enough when you were young? Does your partner take you for granted? Are your friends unappreciative? Do you think that this is what ‘branding’ is all about?
Don’t you realize that what others say about you is taken far more seriously than what you’ll ever have to say about yourself? Your customers are your best credentials.
Understand first… then be understood. It’s never about you. The needs of your client take center stage, whether they live next door or abroad. I also hope you’ll embrace the following principle:
5. KISS your clients.
So much to do. So little time. Now you want me to read this email-novel listing all your accomplishments followed by an endless list of clients, projects and other claims to fame? Give me a break!
I think that there’s much to be said for keeping things short and simple. Perhaps I should leave it at that. But you know me…
Especially when writing to a non-native English speaker, it’s important to use plain English without dumbing things down to Kindergarten level. Simple doesn’t mean simplistic. Avoid long sentences, colloquialisms, slang, jargon and expressions that aren’t exactly universal.
The first time someone said he would give me a rain check, I had no idea what he was talking about and it really rubbed me the wrong way. I thought that person was off his rocker.
Also avoid references to politics, songs, TV shows, advertising campaigns or other phenomena that might be part of your culture, but perhaps unknown abroad.
Even though a show like ‘Seinfeld’ is in syndication all over the world, the impact it has in the context of another country is very different. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Just realize that things like ‘double-dipping,’ the ‘soup Nazi’ or other famous phrases and characters might not have the same effect they have on average Americans. How much do you know about Italian sitcoms? And finally…
6. Be kind. Unwind.
One of the biggest adjustments a European needs to make when coming to the States is the fact that work never seems to stop. Even God rested on the Seventh Day, but the American people keep on truckin’… I even receive business emails on national holidays and my U.S. contacts expect me to answer them promptly.
In Holland (my birthplace) we have things called weekends where people actually relax and spend some downtime with friends and family…
So, don’t be surprised if you’re not getting an immediate response to that urgent email you sent on Friday night. You’re not being ignored. These crazy Europeans are just unwinding and practicing preventative health care. They’ll get back to you on Monday.
If they happen to be on vacation, they might get back to you in four weeks. Did you honestly think that they’d be checking their work email every day? Are you nuts?! Work is work. Time off is time off.
It’s so easy to forget that as an American you live in a no vacation nation. Out of the 33 richest countries in the world, the U.S. is the only one with no legally-required paid vacation for its workers.
To Americans, vacation is a luxury. To Europeans, it is a necessity.
MINDFULNESS
What I’m really saying is this: please become a mindful (international) communicator. This doesn’t start with acquiring knowledge. If all we’d need to change our lives was information, no one would still be smoking or send text messages while driving. Am I right? Information does not transform people. We have to become mindful first.
Mindfulness is an attitude. It’s about being perceptive and sensitive. It’s about the willingness and ability to see the world through someone else’s eyes… for a change. The easiest way to do that is through immersion.
Go away on a shoestring budget! Visit foreign lands. Taste bizarre foods. Become dependent on the kindness of strangers because you don’t speak the language. Don’t bribe the locals with dollars to treat you decently. Let’s see how long that lasts when pickpockets steal your cash, credit cards and passports…
Most importantly: participate. Don’t just observe.
Believe me, on your return, your homeland will never seem the same.
BULLET PROOF
The other day I got an email from my friend Philippe. He wrote:
“Paul, I have a good one for you!
I looked up the right to bear arms.
This is what I found.
Your Constitution says it is okay to carry guns.
But it doesn’t say that these guns have to be loaded.
Now, that’s funny, no?”
“Oh, Philippe,” I said. “You just gave me more ammunition to write a whole new blog.
Just in time for the 2009 holiday shopping season, Carl Amari, the producer behind “Twilight Zone Radio Dramas” and “Mystery Theater”, released an audio interpretation of the Old and New Testaments on 79 CD’s. This 98-hour long production involved over 1,000 actors, technicians and musicians, and features an original music score by Stefano Mainetti, and film quality sound effects. The end result is “The Word of Promise Bible“.
STAR POWER
Jim Caviezel, star of the remake of “The Prisoner”, and crucified in 2004 in Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of the Christ”, reprises his role of Jesus for this epic audio drama. Other cast members include Marcia Gay Harden (Esther), Malcolm McDowell (King Solomon), Richard Dreyfuss (Moses), Jason Alexander (Joseph) and Luke Perry as Judas. Michael York narrates both testaments. British actor Martin Jarvis is the voice of God. Voice-over actor JoBe Cerny (the voice of the Pillsbury Doughboy), directed an incredible 175,000 takes.
As you can imagine, a project like this is fraught with challenges. I know first-hand how hard it is not to step on people’s overly sensitive religious toes, when it comes to recreating creation and all that follows… During my time at the BBC, I was asked to produce an hour long radio drama for Radio 1, which specializes in current popular music and chart hits. The idea was to retell the story of Easter through music and narration, but in a way that would appeal to young adults.
TRANSLATION
One of the first problems I ran into was which translation of the Bible to use. Here are just a few choices:
Revised Standard Version (1952, RSV)
New American Standard Bible (1963, NASV)
The Jerusalem Bible (1966, JB)
New English Bible (1970, NEB)
Living Bible (1971, LB)
Good News Bible (1976, GNB)
New International Version (1979, NIV)
New King James Version (1982, NKJV)
Reader’s Digest Bible (1982, RDV)
There are, of course, a few more ‘exotic’ options. Mike Coles is Head of Religious Education at Sir John Cass’s Church of England Secondary School in East London. He wrote “The Bible in Cockney: Well Bits of it, Anyway….”
Here is his version of the Lord’s Prayer from Luke 11:2-4:
HELLO, Dad, up there in good ol’ Heaven, Your name is well great and holy, and we respect you, Guv. We hope we can all ‘ave a butcher’s at Heaven and be there as soon as possible: and we want to make you happy, Guv, and do what you want ‘ere on earth, just like what you do in Heaven. Guv, please give us some Uncle Fred, and enough grub and stuff to keep us going today, and we hope you’ll forgive us when we cock things up, just like we’re supposed to forgive them who annoy us and do dodgy stuff to us. There’s a lot of dodgy people around, Guv; please don’t let us get tempted to do bad things. Help keep us away from all the nasty, evil stuff, and keep that dodgy Satan away from us, ‘cos you’re much stronger than ‘im. Your the Boss, God, and will be for ever, innit? Cheers, Amen. Who is it for? Geezers and birds, oi, oi, oi
Then there’s the Princess Diana Bible. In this gay version of the Bible, God does not create Adam and Eve. He creates Aida and Eve instead. This Bible is not completed yet, but portions of Genesis and Leviticus can be read on the official website.
“The Word of Promise Bible” uses the 1982 modern translation of the King James Bible.
CASTING
The second challenge was obviously casting. Christian and non-Christian producers are still struggling with questions such as:
Must God really have a British accent?
Could Jesus be a Yankee?
Would it be wrong to cast an African-American as Judas?
If our “voice of God” happens to be female, would the Bible Belt still buy the audio book?
Why can’t King David be played by an openly gay actor?
NARRATOR
For my Easter special, we picked Ezekiel Gray a.k.a. The Man Ezeke, as our narrator. Born in Montego Bay, Jamaica, and nicknamed ‘Rasta’, Ezekiel was the first black daytime presenter on Radio 1. Some had their doubts about a DJ recounting what most people regard as the heart of the New Testament, with a distinct Jamaican accent. There was no reason for concern. Ultimately, the production ended up winning a Sandford St. Martin Award for excellence in Religious Radio Programmes.
IT’S A WINNER
The New Testament from “The Word of Promise Bible” was released in 2007, and was picked as the Christian Book of 2008 by the Evangelical Christian Publishers Association (the first audio Bible to receive this award). So far more than 700,000 copies were purchased. It’s the greatest story ever sold. If you don’t believe me, just ask Joan Allen (Deborah), Lou Diamond Phillips (Mark), Lou Gossett Jr. (John), Stacy Keach (Job & Paul), Gary Sinise (David), Marisa Tomei (Mary Magdalene), Jon Voight (Abraham) or Max von Sydow (Noah).
PS the Word of Promise Bible was nominated for Audio Book of the Year 2010 by the The Audio Publishers Association (APA). On May 25th we’ll find out if it will be the winner of an Audie Award.
On June 5th 1995, John Baur and Mark Summers were playing a friendly game of racquetball. For some mysterious reason, they started encouraging each other in pirate slang. I’ll let them tell the story:
“…whoever let out the first “Arrr!” started something. One thing led to another. “That be a fine cannonade,” one said, to be followed by “Now watch as I fire a broadside straight into your yardarm!” and other such helpful phrases.
By the time our hour on the court was over, we realized that lapsing into pirate lingo had made the game more fun and the time pass more quickly. We decided then and there that what the world really needed was a new national holiday.”
With Halloween upon us, our streets will soon be filled with young Jack Sparrow lookalikes, some of them more Arrr-ticulate than others.
HALLOWEEN
As a voice-over arrr-tist, I absolutely love October 31st. What other holiday gives me the perfect excuse to revisit my crypt of creepy vowels and consonants, and resurrect them for the promotion of a local thrill ride or a scary costume emporium?
At this magical time, I usually take out my secret weapon: the alveolar trill, also known as “rolling R”. Doesn’t everything sound more sinister and spooky with a rolling R? Just think of the prince of darkness himself: Count Drrrracula from Trrrrransylvania.
You should be warned: the Dutch have a distinct advantage in the rolling R department. We roll ‘em out all the time. Words like Rotterdam, Amsterdam, Strikwerda… they wouldn’t be the same without a tongue-twisting alveolar trill. Netherlanders really appreciate their R’s.
The English on the other hand, consistently snub this consonant. What’s even worse, they leave half of them unspoken. Ask any Englishman to properly pronounce the following sentence:
“Not a word about the bird was ever heard until it occurred.”
Tell me, where did the R’s go? Now, if you did hear any rolling R’s in there, you were probably listening to a Scotsman.
PETER PAN
However, there’s one important exception. If a classically trained English speaking actor wishes to add a dash of extra creepiness to his delivery, he will bring back the rolling R. My favorite example: the inimitable Cyril Ritchard in his role of Captain Hook.
Even though most of us will never be asked to play Captain Hook, I believe the alveolar trill should be on the tip of the tongue of every professional voice-over actor. Many of our clients are paying us for our ability to correctly reproduce the names of people and places, foreign and domestic, no matter what our mother tongue may be.
Just as opera singers are expected to master Italian, French and German pronunciation, students in my fictitious voice-over academy would have to take languages classes as part of their verbal acrobatics curriculum. As one of my imaginary students, you’d only be allowed to graduate if you could say the following Spanish sentences correctly, three times in a row:
“Erre con erre cigarro. Erre con erre barril.
Rápido corren los carros sobre los rieles del ferrocarril”
THE MISSING LINK
There are other strange things going on with the R in the English language. As we’ve seen, the R is often written out but not pronounced, as in the sentence “Never say never” (spoken in the Queen’s English, of course). But if that same word precedes a word that begins with a vowel, the same R is pronounced, as in “Never say never again”. This is called a linking R.
On top of that, some English speakers add an R that doesn’t even appear on the page, as in the word “idea-r” or the sentence “President Obama-r-and his Danish counterpart”. Linguists call this phenomenon an “intrusive R”.
And then, there is this famous R…
Peter Cook as the “Impwessive Clewgyman” in Wob Weiners “The Pwincess Bwide”.
As non-native English speakers (such as myself), what-R-we to make of all this? Is there any logic to your language? Is there any welation between your spelling and your pwonunciation?
AMERICA
So far, I have only touched upon the rolling-R and the Bwitish R. What about it’s American counterpart? Well, as you know, the ever so silent British R is often clearly pronounced in the States. Just as the rolling R might be a challenge for Americans, some Europeans have a hard time pronouncing a simple word like ‘hamburger’. See for yourself.
AHOY ME HARTEYS
There’s only day in the year that’s absolutely ideal for practicing your R’s. It’s September 19th, the International Talk Like A Pirate Day! And if you don’t believe me, ask John Baur and Mark Summers. With the help of some friends, they turned a goofy idea into a global phenomenon, with a newsletter called The Poopdeck. It’s arrrguably one of the silliest idears I’ve heard in a long time, and that’s exactly why I love it.
Now, if you will excuse me… I have to get back to my ship. Arrrrr!
No, I won’t name any names, but I was quite shocked by what I found out, recently. Let me ask you a question instead.
Do you know the difference between Flemish and Dutch?
I’m not asking for an exposé on historical linguistics, but say you’re in need of a cheesy Dutch voice for your imitation Gouda commercial. You decide to check out a number of voice-over sites in the hopes of finding the perfect Hollander.
Be honest: would you be able to tell from the demo whether you’re listening to a voice-over talent from Flanders (Belgium) or from The Netherlands? After all, both speak Dutch. Of course I’m assuming you’re not from either one of those countries.
If the answer is “No”, don’t be embarrassed. I discovered that a number of internet voice-over providers don’t seem to know the difference either. What’s even worse: they don’t seem to care. After a random and by no means scientific search, I found numerous colleagues listed under Dutch talent, who were in fact Flemish speakers.
Nothing against my friends from beautiful Belgium, but that’s like listing a North-American under Australian talent, or mistaking a Brazilian for someone from Portugal. Now, most people can tell a Yankee from a Brit. But would you be able to differentiate between a Frenchman and a Québécois, or tell a Swiss actor from an Austrian bodybuilder? And if you can’t, don’t you expect a voice-over site to know the difference between cheese and cheez whiz? Just because something smells like cheese, doesn’t mean that it is cheese.
AMAZING RACE
Not so long ago, my daughter’s school held an international event modeled after the reality show “The Amazing Race”. Different classrooms had been turned into different countries, and volunteer-parents from various parts of the world dressed up in their national costume, served local treats and were asked to speak their mother tongue. Picture me, wearing clogs, waving our red-white-and-blue flag, surrounded by posters of windmills and tulips…
The first thing the contestants had to do was identify the country they had just entered, based on all the ‘subtle’ clues. In order to get full marks, they also had to locate that country on a globe. At this point I should tell you that the teams were made up of children and their parents. So, how well do you think most of them did? Keep in mind that all of this took place in an average elementary school in Pennsylvania.
Well, as soon as I opened my Dutch mouth, some kids looked at their parents and said: “That man sounds very weird, why can’t he speak English?” There and then I realized that many of them had never been exposed to anything else but (American) English and perhaps some Spanish.
One dad thought he had figured me out. “I recognize that accent”, he said with a proud smile on his face. “I was stationed at the Ramstein Air Base for years. You must be from Germany.”
“Not quite”, I said. “My country and Germany are neighbors.” “Oh, now I get it”, said the Dad. “You’re from Sweden! That’s why you are wearing those clogs.”
Some were less clueless, though. As soon as they had spotted the windmills, they shouted: “This must be Holland”. “Well-done”, I said. “Now let’s see if you can find my country on the globe.”
Granted, my homeland is not the easiest to spot because it’s so small. So I thought I’d help the teams a bit by revealing that Holland is part of Europe, counting on the fact that people would certainly know where to find Europe. Wrong! ”
You told us Holland is next to Germany”, said the airman. “I must be blind because I don’t see it.” Then his wife interjected: “Here it is, honey. Right next to Belgium.” “But it says The Netherlands”, the husband answered, “We are looking for Holland…..”
THANKS BUT NO THANKS
Based on my quick survey, some voice-over sites aren’t doing much better than the average American parent. I’m not the type of person that enjoys complaining about things without ever doing something about it. So, I emailed the companies in question, and I respectfully pointed out that the voice-over talent they had listed as Dutch, was actually from Flanders. The result? Seven out of ten websites ignored my helping hand and never even bothered to respond.
When I checked in a week later, their talent listing was unchanged. One site did respond, informing me that they had spoken with their pseudo-Dutchman, and that he denied all charges. The last two sites thanked me profusely for my feedback, and within a matter of hours they had corrected their listing.
VOICE-OVERSIGHT
To a certain extent, ignorance might be excused, but there’s no justification for being unprofessional and misleading.
If I put ‘Champagne’ on a bottle of bubbly from Chile, chances are that I end up in a French court of law. Similarly, I can’t put the name ‘Gouda’ on cheese made in Michigan.
A voice-over site should have some oversight to ensure that if we request a native Dutch speaker for our commercial, we end up with someone from The Netherlands, and not with some faker from Flanders.
One last thing. The other day, a New York-based agency asked me for a Dutch demo. It might take a few days before you hear back from us, they said. We noticed that you’ve been living in the States for quite a while, and we just want to make sure that your Dutch is still accent-free.
That’s why they sent my sample to that small country next to Germany, and had an expert listen to it. A few days later it came back with a seal of approval. Now, that kind of professionalism puts a big smile on my face. And I don’t even have to say “Cheese”!
You’ve probably heard the story of the priest who preached the same sermon every Sunday.
PS 
LOL.
