Articles

Give Me a Break!

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career, Freelancing, Gear 22 Comments

After much use, even the sharpest knives get dull. Paul Strikwerda

 

Can a voice-over pro ever take time off?

Do you have to be available 24/7?

Is it okay to shut down your business for a few weeks of Rest and Relaxation?

Will your Facebook fans unfriend you?

Will your Twitter followers desert you?

Will your voice-overworked agent ever talk to you again?

Let me answer these questions with a question:

What won’t happen if you don’t do it?

BALANCING ACT

I am a big believer in a balanced lifestyle. As a European living in the States (the number 1 “no vacation nation”), I see a lot of people around me who are absolutely addicted to their jobs. Modern technology has made it easier than ever to stay connected and become a burned-out, boss-pleasing slave laborer.

Have we forgotten our history?

On January 31st, 1865, The U.S. House of Representatives passed the 13th Amendment to the Constitution, abolishing slavery in the United States. It read:

“Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude… shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.”

I guess the keyword is involuntary servitude.

We are free people, living in a free country who have earned the right to free themselves of any free time. Instead, we have chosen “voluntary servitude.”

Now, that’s what I call progress in a society built upon the principles of “Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness!”

But let’s put the cynicism and sarcasm aside for a moment. If you’re pursuing happiness as a full-time freelancer, you are in charge of your own destiny. You set your own hours. You determine your own rates. You’re the only one who can call it a day and shout from the roof tops:

Give me a break!

You’re self-employed. You embody your service. Literally. If you don’t take care of yourself, no one else will. If you don’t guard your boundaries carefully, good people with the best of intentions will step on them and leave you depleted.

TRAPPED & TIRED

A few weeks ago, I was asked to do a presentation in front of hundreds of people. Prior to that, there was a reception and -of course- you can’t have a reception without background music. It’s a known fact that most musicians aren’t capable of staying in the background. No matter the crowd, they have to be LOUD.

I knew that if I were to schmooze prior to my presentation, I would have no voice left, even though my vocal cords are well-trained.

As they say: “If you schmooze, you lose.”

Besides, the next day I was going to New York for a recording session and my voice had to be in top-shape in order to sell well.

So, I was left with a choice. Either slip something into the drinks of the band that would have them running to the restroom in a matter of minutes… or hide myself from the crowd until it was time to go on stage.

The first option was obviously more entertaining, but I ended up hiding in the basement. Unfortunately, an overzealous janitor came down, turned off the lights and kicked the door shut, leaving me trapped.

This is where cell phones can save the day. I called the organizer of the event:

“Hi, it’s Paul.”

“Paul, where are you? We’ve looked all over for you!”

“I am trapped in the basement. It is dark in here. Rats are nibbling on my feet. Please rescue me!”

That day, instead of being a voice-over, I became a voice-under.

I think you get my point.

In order to give your all, you sometimes have to get away from it all. But avoid being locked up.

GO AWAY

Now, in an ideal world you would just pack your bags and go where no one can reach you. But what to do when you’re waiting for that all-important callback or that once-in-a-lifetime chance to audition for something you can’t afford to refuse?

In that case, you need to take some gear on the road and improvise. Rather than spending a few hours going over all the options, I suggest you read Harlan Hogan and Jeffrey Fischer’s classic Voice Actor’s Guide to Recording at Home and on the Road. It’s jam-packed with practical information and I highly recommend it to anyone remotely interested in a voice-over career.

Here’s what I take along on my travels:

  • a laptop
  • a microphone
  • a CEntrance MicPort Pro
  • earplug-sized headphones

A MicPort Pro is a nifty mini audio interface/preamplifier that plugs directly into your microphone. On the other side there’s a USB cable that plugs into your computer. In other words: this device can turn any microphone into a USB mic. It has phantom power, a headphone jack and two knobs for setting the record level and the headphone volume.

So… after all that subtle product placement, let’s get back to the original question:

Can you take off for a period of time without ruining your career?

Here’s an experiment you should do at home:

Fill up your watering can to the brim and start watering your plants. Keep on watering and watering and watering… until there’s no more water left.

I don’t have to tell you that -in order for those plants to grow- you need to water them regularly. An empty watering can is useless. The moral of the story:

You can’t give what you don’t have.

Now, why is that so easy to understand when it comes to our plants, and why are we surprised that “We the People,” are so stressed, so drained and left without an ounce of creativity?

Take my advice and get lost! Recharge your batteries. Discover that you have significant others in your life who’d love to get to know you. It can’t be all work and no play… Your job is just a means to an end.

TAKING TIME OFF

Be sure to let your voice casting sites and agents know that you’ll be gone for a particular period of time. If you must, bring your gear, but promise yourself that you will only do what is absolutely essential. Otherwise, you’ll get sucked into obsessive email checking, incessant instant messaging and frantic Facebooking.

Only use your cell phone when you’re stuck in a basement and someone’s thrown away the key.

When you come back from your well-deserved vacation, notice how refreshed, alert and full of energy you are.

People can see it in your face. They hear it in your voice.

Now you’re ready to wow the world again!

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

Send to Kindle

Why you are boring me to death

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career, Pay-to-Play, Promotion 76 Comments

You’d think that voice-over pros always have something to talk about, but what happens when someone’s not feeding them any lines?

Would they still have something interesting to say, or would they be less vocal without a mic and a script?

Well, judging by the many voice-over blogs you can find online, we can’t seem to shut up.

And if we cannot talk, we must type.

Take me, for instance. You know I can’t stop yammering, and I am sure I’m not alone. Why is that? Is there really that much to blabber and blog about?

Yes, there isn’t!

MOO!

I’ve come to the conclusion that VO-Pros and cows have one thing in common: they are ruminants. Most ruminants have four stomachs.

The first stomach chamber (the “rumen”) is the chamber in which large amounts of food are stored and softened. Once it is processed, it is regurgitated and chewed and digested again in different chambers.

At the end there’s only one thing left: bullsh*t.

What I just described is the recycling of supposedly “hot voice-over topics” you and I like to ruminate about. Every year, the same issues and trends resurface, and they are milked and milked until there’s nothing left but utter claptrap.

Here is my shortlist of some of the most boring issues in our business:

  • PC or Mac?
  • Are Pay-to-Plays worth the money?
  • ISDN: must or rust?
  • Do real pros only use ProTools?
  • Headphones or no headphones?
  • Do you perform better while sitting, standing up or laying down?
  • Could a headshot help or hurt your voice-over career?
  • My mic is better than your mic.
  • Union or Non-Union?
  • Should I slate or watermark my demo?
  • Social Media: indispensable tools or magnificent distraction?
  • What did Stephanie Ciccarelli have for lunch?
  • How to succeed in voice-overs without really trying.
  • What would Don LaFontaine do?
  • Remedies for dry mouth and sore throat.
  • Harlan Hogan’s next big Porta-something.
  • Do egg cartons really help soundproof a room?
  • Joan Baker in a bikini.
  • Are celebrities stealing our business?
  • Is it “voice-over” or “voiceover”?
  • Why isn’t there an Oscar or an Emmy for Best Narrator?
  • Why Ted Williams?
  • What the heck is “neutral English”?
  • How many “followers” and “friends” does one need in order to be deemed relevant?
  • Don’t talk to me about reasonable rates. It’s just beer money.
  • When does self-promotion become spamming?

MEA CULPA

I will be the first one to admit that I have sinned by writing about some of these topics myself. That’s why I solemnly vow to not behave like a cow. For my own sanity and yours, I will seek out greener pastures and find more exciting things to write about, and I challenge you to do the same.

Rumination might be good for our bovine friends, but “obsessive or abnormal reflection upon an idea or deliberation over a choice” may lead to depression in humans, says Yale University psychologist Susan Nolen-Hoeksema, PhD. Rumination may also weaken thinking and problem-solving, and drive away critical social support.

In other words, by chewing over the stories of the past, we  might actually un-enlighten and isolate ourselves. That must be the last thing any serious blogger would hope to achieve.

Ruminating is not illuminating.

Now, chew on that for a while!

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

PS Be sweet. Please retweet!

Send to Kindle

Are You Taking Kickbacks?

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career, Freelancing, Money Matters 32 Comments

On August 1, 2007, serial entrepreneur and Boston-based tax accountant Lewis Weinstein quietly launched the beta version of ReferralKey, an on-line referral management system.

Some called it “LinkedIn on steroids.” Others feel it’s just another version of the traditional inbound marketing strategy.

How does it work?

Once you create a ReferralKey online profile showcasing your amazing accomplishments, you can invite others to join your network and start exchanging leads. Does the following viral email look familiar?

Are you taking on new clients?

If you’re taking on new clients, I’d like to include you in my private referral network to send you business leads through Referral Key. Please accept my invitation below. Thanks!

Best,

Person’s Name
Name of Their Company
City, State

It seemed like a good idea at the time, but there was one problem. It didn’t take off. Weinstein told the Boston Globe that professionals using the site felt it just wasn’t helping them generate enough new business. Weinstein: “The common response was, ‘I thought you were gonna send me referrals.”

A wait-and-see approach never works and Weinstein discovered that something essential was missing from his system; something that drives all human behavior: an incentive.

TAKING THE BAIT

You see, the average ReferalKey member wasn’t just going to refer a colleague or a friend on the basis of his or her merits or the existing relationship. Before they were willing to make a recommendation, they needed one question answered:

“What’s in it for me?”

Weinstein’s answer:

Cash, Omaha Steaks, L.L.Bean or Callaway Golf gift cards.

ReferralKey was relaunched in April 2010, based on the following principle:

“Grow your business by offering rewards to other people who send you successful referrals.”

This winning idea turned boring, unresponsive professionals into bounty hunters, ready to stake their claim and claim their steak. I just received an email from a colleague offering me 10% of whatever she will make, if she lands a job based on my referral.

RefferalKey even lets you track referrals to “ensure your relationships are reciprocal.” Yes, my friend, if you rub my back, I’ll rub yours and just so you know, I do keep score!

Do you like it so far? If you’re having any doubts, you’re not alone.

Chris Reimer is Vice President of Social Media at brand developer Falk Harrison. He writes in his blog:

“The first time I got an email with the subject line “Are you taking on new clients?” Holy crap, I was excited! You bet I’m taking clients! (what a hook). Ten seconds later, I felt the shame of spam, deflated, and just a little pissed. After receiving 100 of these emails? No one likes spam.”

Kathryn Delany is a web designer and Search Engine Optimization and Marketing Specialist. She writes:

“I have been sucked into the vortex of the Referral Key saga. I usually am very cautious about these emails. However, the initial invitation came from a long trusted colleague so I signed up. Sadly I followed the instructions on importing my LinkedIn Contacts, little suspecting that this site hijacks the list before you can choose who you would like to invite to your circle. As it ‘imports’ your contacts it automatically sends out the invitation to everyone on it!”

Chris Reimer concludes:

“Stop joining services that blast out marketing messages Uzi-style as ReferralKey.com does. The bad taste you are leaving in people’s mouths is not worth it.”

A MORAL MAZE

Apart from receiving downright annoying emails, I have a more moral objection. There is a good reason why professionals like lawyers, realtors, accountants and therapists have adopted codes of conduct, specifically prohibiting them from taking payment for referrals. It is considered to be unethical.

Look at the definition of bribery:

“An act implying money or gift given that alters the behavior of the recipient”

RefferalKey says it is based on “trusted relationships,” but if you’re meeting a need with greed, what does that really say about your definition of “trust” and “relationship”?

Do you really think you can buy my opinion and influence my behavior by offering me a bounty? Is that how you think I operate? I almost feel insulted!

YOUR TRUE MOTIVES

If I were motivated by money, I probably wouldn’t even be in the voice-over business. Take it from me: You will never do your best work for the love of money. You do your best work when you hold yourself up to standards no one else can or will match. Your best work is always a labor of love and never the result of greed.

Here’s my bottom line: a referral needs to be earned, not bought.

I owe a huge part of my business success to referrals, and I am frequently asked to recommend colleagues. For those recommendations I get paid big time.

Before I tell you what I receive in return, you should know that I take my referrals very seriously. The fact that I will recommended a certain person, reveals as much about me as it does about the person in question.

One can usually judge someone by the company he or she keeps. When you pass the name of a colleague on to someone else, you put your reputation on the line. So, how do you go about it?

When you’re thinking of recommending someone, ask yourself the following question:

How do I know that someone else is good at their work?

Here are your options:

  1. See – I need visual evidence (e.g. I need to watch them do their work)
  2. Hear – I need to hear them (e.g. listen to their demo)
  3. Read – I need to read about them (e.g. a review, a report, a website)
  4. Do – I have to work with them to get a feel for how good they are

In certain circles, the answer to the question “How do I know that someone else is good at their work?” is called a “Convincer Strategy,” and most people come up with more than one answer.

The next question is:

How often does a person have to demonstrate that they’re good at what they do, before I am convinced?

  1. A number of times – e.g. Three or four times
  2. Automatic – I always give someone the benefit of the doubt
  3. Consistent – I’m never really convinced
  4. Period of time – It usually takes e.g. a week, a month… before I can tell if someone’s really good

The last thing you need to be aware of is your frame of reference:

  1. Internal – No matter what anyone says about her, only I can tell whether or not she’s any good
  2. External – A source I trust recommended her, and that’s good enough for me

It’s very common for people to have an internal frame of reference with an external check, or the other way around. If your frame of reference is completely internal, no one will ever be able to convince you of anything. If it’s completely external, your opinion will be totally dependent on what others have to say.

Whether we realize it or not, all of us have different ways of convincing ourselves. If my frame of reference is pretty much internal and a person needs to consistently demonstrate to me that he’s any good by working one-on-one with me, systems like RefferalKey are useless.

It will only work for people with a more external frame of reference who are convinced by reading about someone, and based on that, give the person the benefit of the doubt. How big of a group is that?

QUALITY REFERRALS

Should you decide to give RefferalKey a try, ask yourself how well you know the contacts you’re about to invite and how well they know you. In other words: what is the quality and the depth of the referrals this system generates? Is it worth the risk of pissing people off with automated impersonal email messages?

Referring people can be very rewarding. It’s an essential part of being in business and staying in business, as long as you do it for the right reasons. If you landed a gig as a result of my recommendation, I demand that you pay me back by doing the best job you could possibly do. As one of my teachers used to say:

“If you look good, I look good, so you better make me look good!”

Secondly, don’t send me any money or vouchers for Omaha Steaks. You booked the job because you’re the best and you deserve it. I don’t take any credit (or cash) for that.

Take your 10% and give it to a worthy cause. Pay it forward.

That’s the key to referrals!

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

PS Please refer someone else to this blog by retweeting and “liking” it on Facebook.

Send to Kindle

8 Things I Hate About You

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Internet, Social Media 80 Comments

It’s one of those mornings. I just put on my grumpy pants and I’m not in the mood to write a brilliant article.

I just need to vent about social media.

The non-event that triggered the outburst you’re about to enjoy, is at the top of my list:

1. Robotic requests to connect, befriend, recommend or refer.

You know what I am talking about. Automated messages such as:

“I’d like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn”.
“You are a person I trust…”

Give me a break! Do I know you? Have we

Read the rest of this story in my new book. Click on the cover to access the website and get a sneak peek. Use the buttons to buy the book.

Making Money In Your PJs cover

Send to Kindle


Building a Booth on a Budget – the booklet

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Gear, Money Matters, Studio 28 Comments

Your clients demand and deserve quality audio, but even a top of the line microphone sounds miserable in an unprofessional recording space.

Are you thinking of buying or building a voice-over booth?

Before you spend thousands of dollars, find out what your options are and why building your own studio is easier and cheaper than you may think.

I spent countless hours researching the options, materials and plans to create an affordable vocal booth that keeps the noisy neighbors out of my voice-over projects.

This 46-page booklet documents my search for silence, and it describes the science and art of soundproofing in non-technical language and with plenty of pictures.

Even though it is not intended to be the ultimate guide to home studio construction, it is packed with practical tips, ideas and resources.

This information is also useful if you want to create a quiet space for:

  • Music
  • Movies
  • Multi-media
  • Meditation

My goal was to build a solid, soundproof booth for no more than $2000. Did I make it?

There’s only one way to find out!

Download your copy today.

Once your payment clears, you will receive an email which contains the details of your purchase and the product download link.

Thanks!

Wishing you tranquil times,

Paul Strikwerda

Send to Kindle

What the heck is Neutral English?

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career, International Comments Off on What the heck is Neutral English?

 

It’s time to tackle one of the most frustrating issues in the voice-over business.

It’s particularly frustrating because in all the years that I have been a VO-pro, I have seen little or no change. Voice-seekers are just not getting it and voice talents are putting up with it like meek sheep.

Before I tell you what the issue is, imagine for a moment, being lead into a pitch dark room. In this room -so you are told- you will find a dart board, but it could be anywhere.

You are given no more than one dart and one instruction: You must hit the bull’s-eye. If you don’t, you won’t be given a second chance and all your time and energy is wasted. Questions are out of the question. You are on your own.

Let me ask you this:

How great do you feel your chances are of hitting the bull’s-eye?

Read the rest of this story in my new eBook. Click on the cover to access the website and get a sneak peek. Use the buttons to buy the book.

Making Money In Your PJs cover

Send to Kindle

Shame on you, Mr. Nethervoice!

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career, International 9 Comments

Something strange and unexpected has happened.

Thanks to the growing popularity of this blog, some of my readers now write to me saying:

“Dear Mr. Nethervoice, I enjoy your articles but I never knew you were into voice-overs as well. For how long have you been gracing this world with the sweet, seductive sound of your pleasantly persuasive pipes?”

At that point, I patiently explain that I’ve been working the mic since I was 17, and some three years later I’m still at it. Well, that’ s not entirely true. I feel and act like I’m seventeen… most of the time. Of course information about my illustrious career has been available on other pages of my blog. You know, the ones next to this text that nobody bothers to read.

Since every question is a golden opportunity to enlighten my fans, colleagues and clients alike, I will do something I have never done before, at least not this openly.

For once, I will shamelessly sing my own praises, and if you’re not comfortable with that, I shall retreat into a corner and weep bitter tears of shame and disappointment… and proceed as planned! After all, who is going to stop me?

This is me in a nutshell:

  • full-time voice-over artist and writer
  • records in English, Dutch (mother tongue) and German
  • most in-demand accent:  “neutral” or “European” English
  • specialty: intelligent international narration
  • impressive clients: Novartis, Deloitte, Plantronics, Farmers Life
  • expert-contributor to Internet Voice Coach
  • websites: www.nethervoice.com, www.dutchvoiceover.net
  • Favorite quote: “Your voice is like velcro. Whatever you say sticks

Based on that last line, I should perhaps go by the surname of Stick-worda.

GUIDED TOUR
Now that we’ve made our formal acquaintance, allow me to take you on a quick tour of some of my voice-over projects.

The Dutch are known for being great ice skaters. This is me, telling them about another exciting sport: skate boarding!

On to another mode of transportation. Here’s the only Dutch commercial I ever recorded for the black market:

Ready to get more mileage out of your gas tank? Then you should listen to “Muzzle the Guzzle: 50 Fuel Saving Strategies” by Michael Minsky.

This audio book received an average rating of 4.67 out of 5 stars on the earth-shattering Audible.com Richter scale. Narrated in English by yours truly.

On to other modes of transportation.

 

Meet Andreas Klauser. He’s the President and CEO for CASE IH, one of one of the world’s largest brands of agriculture equipment.

Born and educated in Austria, Mr. Klauser is a native German speaker. CASE IH asked me to dub a series of meet the CEO-videos, as the voice of Mr. Klauser… in German, that is! Kein Problem für mich!

The Austrian ski resort of Zauchensee is one of the hidden treasures of the Alps. Not for long, if it’s up to me.

The Austrian economist Ludwig von Mises was one of the most influential proponents of Liberalism.

Jörg Guido Hülsmann, professor of economics at the University of Paris, tells the full story of his dramatic and inspiring life and contributions in a 1143-page biography.

The Von Mises Institute commissioned me to record the complete audio version of this masterpiece (some 32+ hours) and next week, work will start on a second book.

The Wharton School is the business school of the University of Pennsylvania, an Ivy League university in Philadelphia. Wharton is the world’s first collegiate business school and the first business school in the United States.

I’ll tell you more about Wharton in this presentation:

Haliotika in Brittany (France), offers everything to do with sea fishing, including displays of boats, fish varieties, interactive education for children and boat rides. A very fishy place, indeed.

Take the audio tour, and you’ll hear me as the German voice of Philippe and Claude, two local fishermen talking about net profit.

 

Camp Gurs was an internment and refugee camp constructed by the French government in 1939. In 1940, it became a concentration camp for Jews of any nationality except French, as well as people considered dangerous by the government. I was honored to narrate the German audio tour.

 

This Dutch company has produced an ingenious interactive digital movie course. It contains a large collection of known and unknown film clips from 1878 up to the present day.

Each clip is an example of a new discovery in cinematography: editing, camera movement, image cutouts, sound, talkies, color film, acting method, etcetera. This time, I step into the role of English tour guide.

Speaking of tours, we all have our dream homes. I happen to have quite a few of them and thanks to Spartina Studios, I get to be the host of many of Connecticut’s most precious properties. Here’s one of these humble abodes:

There’s no doubt about it: video increases home sales as long as it’s done right. That’s why I have written “Real Estate Videos & Voice Overs,” a white paper for videographers and real estate agents.

Some people still believe that voice-overs is all about doing silly voices (click here for more misconceptions). Well, sometimes it is! Who would have thought that a Dutchman would ever dub Johnny Depp?

Here’s a video I voiced  for an insurance company. It will never win a prize for best animation, but I sure had a blast doing both voices! (the fun starts at 0:53)

This paint of this last video is still wet. Made in Kibbutz Gat, it tells the story of a multi-national  company most of you have probably never heard of.  It’s in Dutch, so I’ll leave it up to you to figure this one out!

Well, that’s all folks!

Thank you so much for enduring this exercise in self-indulgence. I admire your persistence and perseverance. Now you can go back to your daily chores as you reminisce about the delectable servings of eye and ear candy I had the pleasure of serving up for you.

I’m just going to look and listen to all the videos one last time…

… can’t help myself!

Paul Strikwerda ©2011
www.nethervoice.com

Be sweet: please retweet!

Send to Kindle

MAD AS HELL

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Career 10 Comments

Warning: this post contains some strong language that may not be appropriate for sensitive souls.

* An overly demanding client has nickeled-and-dimed you down to your lowest rate and is never satisfied

* You’re angry at yourself for ever taking on this job making you work for a jerk

* You’re going out of your way to serve a customer and she treats you like a servant

* You spend hours perfecting a proposal and you never hear back from your prospect

* You’ve given a colleague free advice, and now he’s offering your service at half-price

* Colleagues and job sites are bringing your rates down and you can’t do anything about it

* You’ve just lost a dream project; you have no idea why and you feel like giving up

* Your Mom says: “I told you this would happen. Why don’t you get a real job?”

Sounds familiar? If that’s the case, how do you usually respond? Can you let it go, or are you getting sick and tired of having to depend on people who don’t seem to care? How long are you going to put up with that? Isn’t it time to draw a line in the sand and say to yourself:

“I’ve had it. Enough’s enough!”

If that’s the case, why don’t you get up right now and go to the window, open it, and stick your head out and yell:

“I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore!!”

Of course you’re not going to do that. That only happens in movies. You’ve been conditioned to respond in a rational way and to behave like a proper professional.

Shit happens. You just have to make sure it doesn’t hit your fans. Besides, we live in the age of positive psychology where people don’t have problems anymore. People have “challenges”. We don’t run into difficulties. We call them “learning opportunities.” We never fail. We just get a “less than desirable result.” We’ve learned to turn lemons into lemonade and above all… we never, ever argue. We have “spirited debates” instead.

Welcome to the bitter-sweet world of reframing, sugar coating and turd-polishing! Are you feeling any better yet? Should you internalize your anger and put on your happy Facebook face? After all, you don’t want the world to know you’re having a hard day, do you? Everything is always A-ok and the show must go on, right? So, get a grip and pull yourself together!

If only it were that easy.

How healthy can it be, to keep it all inside and pretend everything’s alright all the time? You’re not a saint. Sometimes, you’re a volcano waiting to erupt and you’re ready to slap those people telling you that “everything happens for a reason.” Is that supposed to help? Give me a break!

So, what do you do when your frustration reaches a boiling point and you’ve absolutely had it? Hit the bottle? Hit the wall? Use your partner as a punching bag? That’ll make it all go away, won’t it?

COMMUNICATION STYLES

Even if you’re not a disciple of Sigmund Freud or a follower of Carl Jung, it’s easy to recognize four classic ways of dealing with rage, disappointment and despair. I’ve broken them down into different personalities and I’d like you to meet them.

1. THE PESSIMISTIC DOORMAT: the passive response

– Easily overwhelmed, defeated and depressed
– Blames him or herself
– Excuses the behavior of others
– Avoids confrontation at all cost
– A people pleaser, always ready to take on the victim role
– Gives in; gives up and disengages
– Acts out of fear and fatalism
– Tells you: “I feel like shit.”

2. THE BULLY: the aggressive response

– Acts impulsively
– Takes everything personally
– Goes on the attack and thrives on confrontation
– Blames and criticizes others
– Feels superior because others are always wrong
– Overbearing and controlling: it’s my way or the highway
– Acts out of anger
– Tells the world: “These guys are shit.”

3. THE INDIRECT ADVERSARY: the passive aggressive response

– Acts in a disingenuous way
– Responds with sarcasm and cynicism
– Refuses to openly acknowledge that there’s a problem
– Feels misunderstood and underappreciated,
– Hides true feelings: smiles when angry
– Cooperates but does so begrudgingly, even sabotaging the effort
– Acts out of denial, resentment and evasion
– Won’t tell you: “I pretend I don’t give a shit but I really do.”

GENERALIZATIONS

I’ll be the first one to admit that these profiles are based on broad generalizations. Secondly, I am only describing a type of behavior. Behavior always takes place on a continuum and not every individual will display all characteristics at once. But sometimes it’s easier to make a point by highlighting the extremes.

Third, although some of us have become better at one communication style, we might show tendencies of another style, depending on the situation. In many cases, we have learned these adaptive responses at an early age, often from a role model such as a parent.

Fourth: because people are so accustomed to their own behavior, they are often unaware of their communication style and it kicks in automatically.

If you’re a blogger or a regular participant in discussions on various social networks, you’ve probably dealt with a few of these individuals. The nature and tone of some of the comments people throw at you, can give you an insight into who’s leaving them.

A few examples…

The pessimistic doormat will say things like: “I should have known better. It’s all my fault. There’s nothing we can do about it. It is what it is. Who are we to think that we can change things? It’s been like this for years and it’s no use going against the grain. We’re just a small piece in a big puzzle. Stop wasting your time. I’m sorry but that’s just how I feel.”

The bully will tell you: “You’re dead wrong. I can’t believe you just said that. It makes no sense. When’s the last time you had your brain checked? Stop being so ridiculous. Who do you think you are? Did you even read what you just wrote? These guys owe me big time. I did nothing wrong. They’re the ones that screwed things up. I’ll make them pay!”

The indirect adversary’s favorite phrase is “Whatever,” while moaning and muttering to himself. You should hear the sarcasm when she says: “Sure, we’ll do whatever you want. Let’s see how well that works out.” He’ll tell you: “I’m not upset at all. You seem to be the only one having a problem here. Everything’s fine on my end,” even though things are not at all fine on his end.

But enough about other people. Let’s talk about you. How do you respond when someone’s made you mad as hell and you’re not going to take it anymore? Will you let them have it because they deserve it? What is your weapon of choice: public humiliation, strong language, ridicule? Or will you withdraw from the world and curl up in a ball crying “poor me, this is so unfair!”?

UNDER THE CARPET

I’m not a big fan of sticking strong emotions in a jar and putting a lid on it. That jar is called your body. It’s the house you live in and if you start piling up junk, it will start to rot, stinking up the entire place. Sooner or later, you’ll be poisoning the whole neighborhood. Here’s the thing: all that garbage has to come out at some point, or else the house will burst at the seams. You might as well let it out now.

It’s okay to be mad. It’s unhealthy to stay stuck in it, even if anger motivates you.

Begin by realizing that you’re feeling all these strong emotions because someone or something crossed the line between what’s acceptable and unacceptable to you.

Before you ask yourself what that might be, you have to let off some steam, preferably in a way that does not hurt you or any (significant) others.

The worst thing you could do, is to write an angry response or to let whoever has hurt you “have it,” even though it might be totally justified. Any negative knee-jerk response will almost certainly backfire. On the internet -as in real life- you can’t ever take something back.

What you need to do first, is to get rid of that explosive energy. Break a couple of plates if you must; play some hard rock on Guitar Hero; beat the crap out of your drum kit, leave your house and run a couple of miles… as long as you get out of that mad mood of yours. Here’s a hint: it helps to get physical!

Once you’re out of that angry state, you might realize that you were not really responding to what happened, but to something deeper that was ignited by the event. When we finally give ourselves permission to take the lid off that jar, it’s quite common that a lot of that piled up garbage comes out, that has absolutely nothing to do with the trigger. As a result we overreact.

RESOURCEFUL RESPONSE

Now, as soon as you are in a more resourceful mood, it’s much easier to dissociate from that spark that caused the flame, and figure out how to respond in a more calm and collected way. You might find it helpful to ask yourself a couple of questions. However, steer away from disempowering questions like:

– How could he/she do this to me?
– Why does this always happen to me?
– What’s wrong with me?

Believe me, your brain will always come up with an answer, and you’re not going to like it. Ask these types of questions instead:

  • How can I resolve this situation in a good way?
  • What’s the first thing I can do to turn this around?
  • What help do I need and who can best help me?
  • What have I learned from this that is positive and useful?
  • What changes can I make to prevent this from happening again?

 

Sometimes the answers will come easily. Sometimes they won’t. If you feel that it’s not so hard to get back into that old, negative mood, you’re not going to get very far. It’s better to take some time and change your state of mind before doing something you will later regret. The heat of the moment often magnifies things that -when you look back at them- are no big deal. And if they are, the more reason to respond with care and consideration.

Remember: you own the house you live in. It’s your choice to open your house up to things that don’t support you and to folks that respect neither you nor your property. If they show up at your doorstep with a “present” you don’t want, do not accept it.

By this time, you’re hopefully in a more resourceful mode. The mode of what I like to call:

4. THE RESPECTFUL ADVOCATE: the assertive response

– Being collected and connected
– Owning one’s feelings
– Opening a dialogue: seeking resolution
– Looking at the issue from different sides
– Competently standing up for oneself
– Acting out of confidence and optimism
– Tells you: “I’ll turn this shit into manure.”

You’ll know that you’re in this mindset because you’ll feel much more relaxed and in charge of the situation. You’re doing your best to understand where the other person is coming from, and you realize that just because people do stupid things sometimes, it doesn’t mean that they are stupid.

In this frame of mind, you respond to the present and not to the past. You deal with the event and leave it at that.

You stand up for yourself from a place of confidence, not arrogance or anger. You make your point knowing that not everyone will or has to agree with you.

You are aware that you can’t control others. You can only control yourself. People can only push your buttons if you let them. You choose your battles and you walk away when people disrespect you. You choose to surround yourself with friends that support and respect you. You deserve no less.

This is your house. This is your garden.

You sow the seeds and weed the weeds.

May it bloom as you blossom,

and may your home be filled with

laughter, peace and prosperity!

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

Be Sweet. Please retweet!

Send to Kindle

Is voices.com playing a numbers game?

by Paul Strikwerda in Articles, Internet, Money Matters, Pay-to-Play 15 Comments

On February 11, 2011, VOICES.COM released new numbers testifying to the success of the company.

There’s every reason to congratulate the owners, David and Stephanie Ciccarelli. They proudly announced “$39,290,580 in Total Earnings by Voice Talent at Voices.com.”

Some commentators concluded that the data in the report are a summary of this company’s past year in business, but Stephanie Ciccarelli states:

“These numbers are based upon the last several years of data we’ve collected at the site.”

What does she mean by that?

Voices.com has been in business since 2003, starting as “Interactive Voices”. In September 2006, Interactive Voices became voices.com.

The new report speaks of:

155,915 All-time number of jobs awarded to voice talent.”

In 2011, voices.com stated on their About-page that they are “creating 6911 job opportunities on average, each and every month.” My calculator tells me that this adds up to an average of 82,932 jobs per year.

How did voices.com arrive at 155,915? The verbiage “All-time number of jobs” suggests that they started counting from the very first day of business. Was that in 2003 or as of September 2006? Let’s do the numbers:

155,915 : 7 years = an average of 22,273 jobs per year (2003-2010)

155,915 : 3 years = an average of 51,971 jobs per year (2007-2010)

And what about $39,290,580 in total earnings? Is that also “based upon the last several years of data”?

PERSPECTIVE

It’s impossible to put these numbers into proper perspective if we don’t know what time period we’re talking about. That’s exactly the problem I have with most of the numbers coming from voices.com. I’m not saying that they are pulled out of a hat, but they lack clarity and context and they don’t always stand up to simple scrutiny.

The same can be said about their “Annual Report on the Voice Over Industry.” It is not compiled by an established, independent market research firm, but by the CEO of voices.com, David Ciccarelli.

As long as we cannot independently verify the numbers, or get a clear sense of the time period during which these data were collected, I choose to look at these reports as marketing tools, more than anything else.

AVERAGE FEE

Stephanie Ciccarell broke down the $39,290,580 in Total Earnings by Voice Talent at voices.com.

On average” -she writes- “a voice talent made $252.97 per job” using their service.

I haven’t been keeping track of the voices.com numbers over time, but it would be interesting to see whether or not the average payment per job went up or down since 2003, and if so, by how much.

Stephanie Ciccarelli concludes:

“10,000+ people have earned a respectable income from doing voice overs with Voices.com serving as a key part of their marketing strategy.”

Once again, the numbers are vague and note that the term “respectable income” is not defined.

Here’s one scenario:

Let’s assume a talent lands one job per week on voices.com at $252.97. That would bring in $13,154.44 per year.

The talent decides to use the voices.com SurePay escrow system, at a 10% fee per job, costing him $1315.44. This brings the gross income down to $11.839.00. Subtract 10% for expenses and we’re left with: $10,649.10. Subtract from that amount $1504 in self-employment taxes and we arrive at a grand total of $9,149.10.

Would you call that a “respectable” income?

The 2011 Federal Poverty Guidelines of The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services puts the income level at $10,890 for a one person household.

Of course this is a theoretical example. Some voices.com jobs pay a lot more and some pay a lot less. No professional voice-over talent should entirely depend on one source to generate leads and make a living. At the same time, not everyone will land one gig a week using voices.com. Stephanie did write:

“10,000+ people have earned a respectable income from doing voice overs with Voices.com.”

In his analysis of the report, colleague Peter O’Connel comments:

Taking the Voices.com figure ($252.97), as a P2P industry average – that figure, I believe, doesn’t reflect what the voice over customer market “dictates”.

I believe it reflects what the voice over customer market “can get away with” with the help of the pay to play (P2P) business model.

ADDING IT ALL UP

There’s no doubt about it: voices.com has become one of the market leaders in online voice casting. That role comes with responsibilities. Market leaders have the clout to be trend setters and “power pricers”.

Voices.com has become more than a neutral playing field where supply meets demand. It has developed into a game changer that can write the rules of engagement by dictating the terms and conditions.

One of those conditions is “a minimum project posting requirement for any job posted publicly and this amount is $100.” By the way, this doesn’t mean that a voice seeker can’t go any lower than that. Voices.com states:

“If your budget is lower than $100 then you may post a job privately using the Request Quote function within our search engine or you may email talent directly with your project details and budget.”

Critics feel that the Pay to Play business model is in part to blame for the steady decline in voice-over rates and professional standards. Peter O’Connell:

I don’t believe or financially support any service in which voice talent “pays to play” i.e. pays a subscription to receive auditions. I believe such services lower the rate expectations of potential clients because so many voice talents who swim in the pay to play pool low ball their rates out of what I feel is a kind of sad desperation for revenue of any kind.

The pay to play model negatively impacts the voice over business and its practitioners, in my opinion.

It has been suggested that if voices.com is really interested in their members making a “respectable income,” they should start by raising that $100 minimum rate immediately.

Secondly, as of 2015, voices.com claims it has a global network of over 125,000 members. I used to be one of them. I think the members should expect and demand a lot more transparency and accountability when it comes to numbers.

As voices.com so aptly pointed out: they did not make $39,290,580 in total earnings.

Their members did.

Paul Strikwerda ©nethervoice

Send to Kindle